A Mortal Kombat Style Tournament For Movie Action Legends

We tried to make a normal pop culture debate episode and accidentally built a full-on Mortal Kombat tower for action heroes. The premise is brutal and simple: we each draft a roster of action icons, throw them in a bag, and random-draw matchups while the fight locations change every round. Subway station. Jungle. Library. Missile silo. Submarine hallway. Crane platform. If you’ve ever argued “who would win” in an action movie fight, this format turns that question into a fast-moving tournament where one detail can flip everything. 

The twist is our limited weapon pool. Each weapon can only be used once, so every choice feels like a gamble and every “save it for later” plan eventually backfires. That’s how we end up seriously debating matchups like Jackie Chan in a library, Bruce Lee in close quarters, and the late-game collision of Jason Bourne, John Wick, Rambo, and Daniel Craig’s James Bond. We keep bumping into the real question behind every movie character battle: is the winner the best fighter, the best improviser, or the one with the most plot armor? 

The bracket ends with a final stretch that’s equal parts strategy and chaos, including a hallway gunfight that changes everything and a last duel that crowns a very specific kind of action hero champion. If you love action movie podcasts, tournament episodes, and heated (but fun) pop culture arguments, you’ll have plenty to agree with and plenty to challenge. 

Subscribe for more debates, share this with the friend who always argues the wrong winner, and leave a review with your most controversial matchup take.

Transcript

Cold Open And Battle Rules

SPEAKER_03 0:00

Mortal Kombat Weep weep weep weep weep weep weep This is the saddest Mortal Kombat. Are you ready to rumble?

SPEAKER_04 0:28

Hello and welcome to Entertain This. A fight to the death about movies, TV shows, and video games. Today we're doing a special crazy episode that we put a lot of effort, energy, and uh probably a stupid amount of uh you know we're we're just gonna end up arguing the end of this anyway.

SPEAKER_01 0:47

That Tom and Hayden put a lot of effort into. I normally put a lot of effort into my stuff.

SPEAKER_04 0:51

Uh well, thanks for the uh acknowledgement there. Uh but before we explain exactly what we're doing for this uh crazy episode, let's do our social media Mitch.

SPEAKER_01 1:00

Well at entertainthhispodcast.com, which will take you to our Facebook group and page, which is entertain this exclamation point and entertain this exclamation point podcast. Yes, I'll go to our Twitter, which is entertain, our Instagram, which is entertain.this, and our YouTube and TikTok, which are entertain this exclamation point. The sheer focus.

SPEAKER_03 1:17

Don't look at Tom.

SPEAKER_04 1:18

He's got his blinders up like a horse. Muting his uh micro or his headset or whatever. All right, so we're doing okay. This is a mortal combat tower battle. All right. We have selected 10 action heroes apiece, and then I made us chop them up and throw them into a bag, and then we randomly drew them. So who Mitch thought he was gonna have didn't necessarily play out. Yeah, for everybody else too. Uh we also planned this. We also picked 15 locations because there should be 15 battles, right? Originally, yes. Yeah, we'll see. You might be like, wait, we didn't do our math right. Yeah, go get your dice real quick. Uh so 15 battles, and then that will be picked randomly. Okay. And then uh we each have five weapons ranging from somewhere between a stabby melee weapon to a projectile explosive. You only get to use the weapon once per year hero. Okay. No, no, no, this is for the locations. So a one to fifteen somehow. Um so the way it's gonna work is let's say Mitch has John McClain and I have John Wick. Alright. That'll be a horrible fight. We're gonna initiate the fight by first figuring out where they're gonna fight. So uh if Tom's the judge, he's gonna roll a dice and say you're gonna fight on, you know, an iceberg. And then uh Mitch is going to say, Okay, John McClain needs some help. He's gonna get an RPG, and I'm gonna be like, I have John Wick, so I'm good. And then we uh argue about who we think would win given the environment, the weapons, the odds, and then Tom decides, and then we move up our winner from that floor to the next floor, and then we'd be just RPGs John Wick.

SPEAKER_03 3:08

Have you seen John Wick for? Yes, an hour ago. The dude fell from like three buildings. And that's not even the first time.

SPEAKER_02 3:17

Have you seen the other movies? I know the dude's bones are made out of adamantis.

SPEAKER_04 3:20

That's what I'm saying. He's a spokesperson for milk. All right. Um so do we all understand the rules? Okay. This is short. This will probably fall apart halfway through. We're just gonna go to yelling.

SPEAKER_02 3:31

We'll just wing it. Should swearing be allowed after the hour mark?

SPEAKER_04 3:35

All right. All right, since it is Tom's birthday, he gets to be the first judge. Happy birthday, Tom.

SPEAKER_02 3:40

Thank you.

SPEAKER_04 3:41

So me and Mitch go first.

Ripley Gets The First Upset

SPEAKER_04 3:43

All right. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:43

So I will I will roll for your location.

SPEAKER_04 3:47

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:48

12. You are fighting in a subway station. Huh.

SPEAKER_04 3:52

Alright. You want to announce your guy first? You want me to announce my guy first?

SPEAKER_01 3:56

Are we going with number one or number 10?

SPEAKER_04 3:58

Number one.

SPEAKER_01 3:59

Hub McCann. Or McCain. I don't know who that is. Hub McCann.

SPEAKER_02 4:02

Hub McCann is Robert Duvall's character from secondhand lions. Who fought in two world wars, fought in the French Legion, beat the crap out of a bunch of teenagers with knives while giving them pointers on how to do it and still kick the crap out of them.

SPEAKER_04 4:15

Ripley from Alien.

SPEAKER_02 4:16

My money's on Hub McCann.

SPEAKER_01 4:18

Ah, I can take her, yeah.

SPEAKER_04 4:19

You think so?

SPEAKER_01 4:20

Yeah. Unless she's got like one of them aliens killing guns.

SPEAKER_02 4:23

Hub McCann is old. Uh-huh. But he still was beating the crap out of people.

SPEAKER_01 4:27

Ripley is maybe a hundred pounds.

SPEAKER_04 4:28

What if I give Ripley a uh an AR-10? And they're in a subway station, mind you. That was gonna be loud. Yeah. But I mean, she's used to screaming aliens and stuff like that. So if she can fight aliens in little tight crawly spaces, she can fight an old geriatric man with an AR-10.

SPEAKER_01 4:48

I mean, but he is very wily. He's like he's quick.

SPEAKER_04 4:51

In okay, in what? A subway station?

SPEAKER_01 4:54

I'm trying to finagle this somehow.

SPEAKER_04 4:56

What is he gonna do? Like dodge the subway?

SPEAKER_01 4:58

Like he could wait till like they stop and it throws her off balance and then lunge for her. I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 5:01

Uh-huh. Uh-huh. So I'm trying to make this plausible. I I think your old man with no weapons versus Ripley, who survived not one, not two, not three, but four alien movies, even though she was cloned in the fourth one. Okay. You know.

SPEAKER_02 5:16

Home McCann survived two world wars and multiple smaller conflicts between continents.

SPEAKER_04 5:20

And all the planets that Ripley killed aliens at, those were basically world wars because that's all that was going on in those worlds at that time.

SPEAKER_01 5:26

So way to justify it.

SPEAKER_04 5:31

You do have a point. So uh yeah.

SPEAKER_02 5:39

And you and you are using a weapon?

SPEAKER_04 5:40

An AR-10, yes.

SPEAKER_01 5:42

So we only get to use that weapon one time with everybody on the list. That's right.

SPEAKER_02 5:45

So Hayden's already down one weapon.

SPEAKER_04 5:47

So she can. I mean, an AR10 is a 308. It's got significant bullet penetration. So if he hides behind like a bench or something.

SPEAKER_02 5:53

Or a column made out of concrete and steel.

SPEAKER_01 5:56

Hence the reason I'm not using a weapon to fight back. No. I'm just gonna let him have that one.

SPEAKER_02 6:00

I I'm just saying, I think I mean, yeah, yes, you have a ranged advantage, uh-huh. But in terms of sheer hand to hand.

SPEAKER_04 6:08

Okay. So I mean, I feel like since she's used to hand-to-hand from aliens, you know, but she's just close to aliens. Right, but she's used to like not getting in within grabby distance.

SPEAKER_02 6:18

She's not punching aliens in the face.

SPEAKER_04 6:19

So she's used to she knows if she gets close to an alien, they grab her, she's dead, right? So she's used to keeping her distance. Yeah. She gets grabbed a lot. She's gonna try this guy as well.

SPEAKER_01 6:28

I'm just saying, I'm just saying. You can say it's sexist or not, and Hope McCann gets a hold of her, she's not getting away. She's like a hundred pounds.

SPEAKER_04 6:34

That's why she's got a gun and she's keeping her distance.

SPEAKER_01 6:37

Okay, okay. So it's up to you, Tom.

SPEAKER_02 6:40

I hate I mean the AR-10 is is tough to shirk off.

SPEAKER_01 6:46

I mean, I I'm forfeiting basically, because I'm allowing him to win because he's used up his AR-10, and this is a guy that I didn't even know who it was to begin with.

SPEAKER_02 6:54

I'd have to give it to Ribley with an AR-10.

SPEAKER_04 6:56

Thank you. Thank you. So da-da-da-da! She moves up a level, and Mitch, your dude's dead. Yeah. Sorry.

SPEAKER_01 7:01

It's okay. I've planned out my list.

SPEAKER_04 7:04

Alright. Now we will move on to uh me versus Tom, and now Mitch is the judge.

Topper Harley Meets Reality

unknown 7:12

Okay.

SPEAKER_04 7:13

This will be round two. This will be round two, and I have Ripley still. So who who matches up against Ripley? And first off, first off, uh, where are we fighting at?

SPEAKER_02 7:22

Well, I imagine are we still in the subway?

SPEAKER_04 7:24

No, you want to roll the world again. Yeah. 10. Which is Mechanic Shop. Okay. That's basically every space station that Ripley has been in. She's like an engineer too, so some some sort of yes.

SPEAKER_01 7:38

Now, see, I I gotta pick mechanic shop as one of the locations because you know there's there's pipes and stuff laying around.

SPEAKER_02 7:43

So my number 10 is Topper Harley. The Hotshots guy. From Hotshots, which is uh Charlie Sheen, who killed many people. Yeah, with a chicken. With a chicken.

SPEAKER_03 7:53

I mean, he's basically a superhero. Isn't that the bit where he picks up the bullets and throws them at everybody and they all in the crowd? Okay, so in real world physics. So Ripley's dead.

SPEAKER_04 8:04

In real world physics, Mitch. In real world physics, not hotshot physics. Okay. Okay. Or if he throws bullets, they just bounce off of people. They don't kill them.

SPEAKER_01 8:15

I mean, it depends on how hard you throwing.

SPEAKER_02 8:17

I mean, he barely aimed.

SPEAKER_01 8:22

Does Ripley still have her gun? No. I know, okay.

SPEAKER_04 8:26

Oh, my money's on top of Harley. So so the AR10 is one round only. Yeah, you only get one weapon for one round. Alright, I'm not gonna use a weapon.

SPEAKER_01 8:33

I mean.

SPEAKER_04 8:34

You're killing Ripley. Yes. Yes. You know how many people she's killed? How many, how many. Did you watch Hotshots?

SPEAKER_02 8:40

How many people did Charlie Sheen kill?

SPEAKER_04 8:41

It was a tiger. Charlie Sheen has tiger blood. He was basically a cartoon.

SPEAKER_01 8:46

He's still the size of Rambo.

SPEAKER_04 8:48

Yeah, he got pretty big for that movie. All right, Mitch, if that's the way you say it.

SPEAKER_01 8:51

He's still the size of Rambo. Goodbye, Ripley.

SPEAKER_04 8:54

My sweet princess.

SPEAKER_01 8:55

I just don't see her fighting him hand-to hand.

SPEAKER_04 8:57

Have you seen Sigorni Weaver? She's like seven feet tall.

SPEAKER_01 9:00

Yeah, and a hundred pounds.

SPEAKER_04 9:02

Charlie Sheen's like, what, six?

SPEAKER_01 9:04

Now, back then when she was Ripley?

SPEAKER_02 9:06

I should have just wrote, like, instead of Topper Harley, I should have just wrote Wild Thing from with the baseball movie. Just like he gets a baseball and glasses so he can see.

SPEAKER_04 9:15

Alright, so I'm down one. Mitch is down two. Has advanced.

Sloth Starts Wrecking The Bracket

SPEAKER_04 9:20

He has advanced. Now it is Tom versus Mitch. Tom, we know who your contestant is, Mitch. Sloth. Oh. Should we even roll for a location?

SPEAKER_03 9:31

Slot as well. Go ahead. Roll for it. Go ahead. Sloth from uh the Goonies.

SPEAKER_02 9:36

Hey, you guys. 12. We already did 12. Rerolling. Two. Skyscraper roof.

SPEAKER_04 9:43

Okay. Alright, let me hear your arguments. I'm ready.

SPEAKER_01 9:48

Um sloth is really good at throwing people off of cliffs because he threw the people off the cliff into the water and off the boat into the water.

SPEAKER_02 9:56

He does move very slow. He has limited vision because one eye is where it should be, the other one's three inches down his face.

SPEAKER_01 10:02

But hitting him essentially does nothing.

SPEAKER_04 10:05

Even with boat or there's no weapons involved in this, correct? I have not chosen a weapon. Okay. You have up until I say I'm picking.

SPEAKER_01 10:14

I can't give Sloth a weapon because he won't know how to use it. You might as well give him a chocolate bar.

SPEAKER_04 10:19

Are you giving him a weapon? Uh go once. Go twice.

SPEAKER_02 10:23

No, Topper Harley will fight without a weapon.

SPEAKER_04 10:24

All right.

SPEAKER_01 10:24

I think Sloth can pick him up and throw him over the edge. He's got the strength and the durability.

SPEAKER_02 10:30

Topper Harley does have strength in training as well, in actual training. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 10:34

Yeah, but uh Sloth breaks down boulders to get through the cave.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

That's right. That's true. He was shackled up and he did rip it out of the wall. But only because he got really mad.

SPEAKER_01 10:45

You don't think he's gonna get mad if Topper Harley tries to throw him off a skyscraper or kill him?

SPEAKER_02 10:50

Unless Topper Harley does anything to intimidate him or invoke his rage. Or if he just walks up and goes, hey buddy, and then BAW punches him right in the nuts and kicks him off the side of the skyscraper. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 11:02

I don't think that doesn't matter. Can you expand on that, Tom?

SPEAKER_02 11:09

Sloth is an idiot. Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 11:11

But he did have great balance. Like, I mean, he was if he was fighting off the two other goons while they were hitting him.

SPEAKER_02 11:17

And he did do the Arrow Flynn knife thing through the sails. That's pretty awesome. I think Sloth wins. The more I'm talking about him, I'm sorry. Sloth was one of my top 10. I was like, that'd be a great one.

SPEAKER_04 11:31

I would have given it to you, Tom, if if you had said something to the effect of Charlie Sheen or whatever his name is, uh tries to befriend Sloth and then tricks him into like killing himself or something like that, because he is an idiot and could have done that. That's what the Goonies essentially did was tricked him into being his friend and you know and candy. Yeah, with candy. So if you know you don't have candy, what are you talking about?

SPEAKER_01 11:50

There's no weapons. This is no candy on this list.

SPEAKER_04 11:53

Alright, so we're all down one now, right? Yes. Alright, this is moving along smoothly. I'm pretty impressed. So sloth advances. Okay. So it's sloth. What place are we fighting? This is gonna be round four. Alright.

SPEAKER_01 12:11

Round four.

SPEAKER_04 12:13

Where where's our fighting scenery? Eight.

SPEAKER_03 12:20

Edge of cliff. Okay. In the rain. In the rain. Alright. Because that's what Hayden wants. So sloth versus Axel Foley.

SPEAKER_04 12:29

Now I do feel like Axel Foley is smart enough to figure out that he can trick this guy and be like, you know, there's candy over the ledge, you know, or you know, uh your friends are over the ledge, or something like that, you know, it trick sloth into going on. I feel like wit is the only thing Axel Foley would have a chance with sloth, but sloth's still pretty big and so if he tries to befriend him and he's you know, if you if you roll for charisma for Axel Foley, out of all the characters on. Yeah, but out of all the characters that we have on our list, Axel Foley probably has the most charisma out of all of them, right?

SPEAKER_01 13:07

I can see Axel Foley going to hit him and knock him off the thing and he just hit and go.

SPEAKER_04 13:11

But Axl Foley wouldn't do that because he goes, What's that over there?

SPEAKER_01 13:15

Kick his knee out or something.

SPEAKER_04 13:16

Yeah, so I think that of all the if he could charisma his way into defeating Sloth, I think Axel Foley could win.

SPEAKER_01 13:22

I think if Sloth could get a hold of him in any way, he could just yeet him off the corner of the cliff.

SPEAKER_04 13:27

I'm just saying, it would be a he obviously Axel Foley can't even touch Sloth because that would be a mistake. And he would know that, looking at his sheer size. So he would try to communicate with him and then he would realize his way in unless Charizard. If you want to use a weapon, I do not want to use a weapon. I want Axel Foley to win because he's talking off the ledge. Talking him off the ledge.

SPEAKER_02 13:48

Because this is one of the few characters you could talk to to try to sway. Yeah. Because he's an idiot. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:55

I just I still feel like I mean he's not dumb enough to commit suicide.

SPEAKER_02 13:58

Yeah. From the he could be duped a little bit and maybe positioned. Just like you know.

SPEAKER_03 14:05

Take a picture. I want to take your picture. Take a step back a little bit further, a little bit further. Like a bug's bunny cartoon. Yeah, yeah. Don't cross this line. Don't cross that one. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 14:18

Decisions, decisions. I'm just saying, if anybody could talk sloth into his death, it would probably be Axel Foley.

SPEAKER_02 14:24

It probably would be. To be honest, he is the most charismatic of the people that I recall. I think there's only one person who might physically take sloth. Or probably there's probably two.

SPEAKER_04 14:34

Well, don't announce it yet. We'll we'll we'll see when we get to it. So I don't know. Announce your winner, Tom. Sloth. Sloth is just gonna.

SPEAKER_03 14:42

This game's rigged! HAYES! And Hayden has left the podcast. He's coming back with the ladder!

SPEAKER_04 14:54

Alright, so I'm down two now. Sloth wins.

SPEAKER_02 14:58

Sloth wins. And that's Mitch's guy.

SPEAKER_04 15:02

This is gonna be a fight to get through. You're gonna have to burn a weapon to get through sloth, Tom. Just telling you right now. I know. I'm gonna have to kill him.

SPEAKER_02 15:08

So my number nine is Dalton from Roadhouse. Okay. Roundhouse kick. Yeah, just he's just gonna roundhouse kick him right off the side of the cliff. In this boulder of a hill.

SPEAKER_04 15:18

I'm not gonna even argue on behalf of Mitch.

SPEAKER_02 15:20

Yeah. Uh 6. There was no 16. There was no 19. Why can't I roll this given one? Industrial complex. Alright. Is the fight.

SPEAKER_01 15:32

So there's a bunch of pipes and stuff around. And chains.

SPEAKER_02 15:35

Lots of which Dalton has fought with weapons. I imagine the pool stick and Roadhouse.

SPEAKER_01 15:39

Sloth has thrown people around that touched him with a chain.

SPEAKER_04 15:42

I imagine that it's like Terminator 2, where there's like vats of Malton lava and stuff like that. Weird 80s construction styles.

SPEAKER_02 15:51

Everybody's sweating. Everybody is sweaty, yes. Alright. I mean, Dalton has sheer speed technique. If he gets close to Sloth, he could do the throat rip.

SPEAKER_04 16:03

I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 16:04

That's a big throat. I mean, you saw how quickly he did it to the guy. That's a big net. The guy's like, I used to have guys like you in prison.

SPEAKER_00 16:10

He's the guy! He just rips the dude's throat.

SPEAKER_01 16:14

Mitch, let me hear your your uh I mean I still feel like if if he gets close enough, he's a smaller guy. So if Sloth gets a hold of him, he's going wherever sloth wants to put him.

SPEAKER_02 16:23

I don't know. I think Dalton could pull the uh the smooth talker to put him in a lull.

SPEAKER_01 16:28

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 16:29

Because that's how he beats up all the other people. He's just like, be nice. I mean, like until it's time not to be nice. And the guy's like, your mom's a, you know, oh who or I feel like sloth could pick up like two by fours and just start swinging them. Like, you know, but there will be a metal pull there for no reason whatsoever, other than that it's there. And Dalton will be able to use that as like a bow staff.

SPEAKER_01 16:49

And that might piss off sloth and you start swinging it back.

SPEAKER_02 16:52

Or Dalton can swing fast enough, Sloth doesn't have the dexterity to catch it.

SPEAKER_04 16:57

Alright, alright. Closing arguments. Tom, you first. All all your attributes that your champion here is gonna have.

SPEAKER_02 17:03

I mean, vast martial arts skills, uh-huh, great endurance to pain, sheer speed, uh-huh, technique, able to use other weapons, handsome.

SPEAKER_04 17:13

Oh. So maybe a little bit of charisma.

SPEAKER_02 17:16

A little bit of charisma there. Okay. And he had great hair in that movie.

SPEAKER_04 17:19

That's true.

SPEAKER_02 17:20

You don't mean to list attributes? It's Patrick Freakin' Swayze. That is true.

SPEAKER_01 17:23

You don't mean to list attributes?

SPEAKER_02 17:25

He's big and he's durable. Only because he was played by John Matuzak, who was like seven feet tall and a football player.

SPEAKER_04 17:32

There's not much else there to it. Alright, I think if it was just an open, barren warehouse.

SPEAKER_02 17:38

This would be a lot like Andre the Giant fighting Wesley.

SPEAKER_04 17:41

I I think that Sloth would win. But because there's tools, vats of lava, and you know, chains and whatnot, and you have Patrick Swayze, who is a very charismatic, handsome man. I'm gonna have to give it to him. Yes! Sloth is dead. Roadhouse!

SPEAKER_01 17:57

Now that he's dead, I would have argued that Axel Foley and the uh guy from Roadhouse would have won too.

SPEAKER_02 18:03

Oh yeah. I mean Axel Foley and Dalton would have been a better fight.

SPEAKER_01 18:09

I just had to I had to pull from a guy, you know?

SPEAKER_02 18:10

No, no, no, I I get you. I get you.

SPEAKER_04 18:12

Yeah, but yes, I believe the other impromptu debate team for action heroes. I just like we it's like handsome. I mean, yeah. What do you do?

Dalton Goes On A Run

SPEAKER_04 18:23

All right, so I was working with what I had. It's uh what have you judged?

SPEAKER_01 18:28

I haven't yet, no.

SPEAKER_04 18:29

Okay, so it's me versus you now.

SPEAKER_01 18:32

Oh, yeah, I did do one judge, but that was all right.

SPEAKER_04 18:35

Uh so I have Mr. Smith from Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Okay. Against uh Dalton. Yes. What's our uh also handsome? Yeah. What's our what's our place? Where are we fighting? Uh we did eight fifteen.

SPEAKER_02 18:51

Library.

SPEAKER_04 18:52

Okay. Alright, so who would use I feel like Mr. Smith, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, they use their They use guns a lot. They use their location, a lot of like tools.

SPEAKER_02 19:04

Yeah, because they have weapons hidden all over their house in the movie. Well, there's like slamming doors in people's faces.

SPEAKER_01 19:08

They didn't beat each other up in the dining room and all across the house.

SPEAKER_02 19:11

Like yeah, throwing knives that they found in the kitchen, guns that are hidden behind paintings.

SPEAKER_01 19:15

Well, they didn't really like well, go ahead.

SPEAKER_04 19:18

I'm just saying, I'm just saying, I feel like that it given the location that Mr. Smith could improvise a lot better than Dalton can. Because all he has is like bar stools in his feet.

SPEAKER_01 19:27

But can they do it silently?

SPEAKER_04 19:28

Why does it have to be silent? It is a library. Uh well, if if he makes too much noise, Mr. Smith can just change his identity, move somewhere else, anyways.

SPEAKER_02 19:39

Boom! Dalton can do the same thing. He goes from bar to bar, state to state, just disappears because he's a cooler. He shows up at an obnoxiously loud and rambunctious library to put Brad Pitt out of his Brad freaking misery.

SPEAKER_04 19:52

No, he's like he's like a he's like a like a you know rednecked deadbeat version of Brad Pitt because he goes to roadhouses and not sophisticated high-class places.

SPEAKER_02 20:01

Well, he turns them into sophisticated high-class places with his awesome hair and his roundhouse kicking of people in the face.

SPEAKER_04 20:07

They're still they're still brawling over peanuts and stuff in every one of those roadhouse places.

SPEAKER_02 20:11

Otherwise, it wouldn't be a fun movie.

SPEAKER_04 20:12

Nah, no. No, I I think Brad Pitt takes the kick because he can improvise, he is also very handsome, and he's made more movies.

SPEAKER_02 20:22

Well, it's because Patrick Swayze died.

SPEAKER_03 20:25

Don't make me feel bad.

SPEAKER_01 20:26

And then uh, you know, arguing for Brad Pitt, we're arguing for Mr. Smith. That's true.

SPEAKER_04 20:30

It's been a one movie. Uh, and he ends up getting Angela Jolene in the win in the end, so that's like the guaranteed win no matter what.

SPEAKER_02 20:36

So after he had to beat the ever loving, he's a woman hitter.

SPEAKER_03 20:39

It's an equal opportunity. He is the proponent of domestic violence, and I will not stand for it on this show, Hayden. And your misogynistic views. Look, look, it's their don't don't kink shame, Tom. It's what they had going for each other. Not once did Dalton hit a woman.

SPEAKER_04 21:02

Yeah, but you know, he did go to prison a couple times, right?

SPEAKER_02 21:05

No, he didn't go to prison.

SPEAKER_04 21:06

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 21:07

The guy he throat ripped, he went to prison. All right, all right.

SPEAKER_04 21:12

I think we've made our arguments, bitch. What say you?

SPEAKER_01 21:15

Basing off of your arguments, I would go with uh Tom Scott from Rhode Island. Yes! Now, if you had included into your argument the fact that your guy takes on trained assassins and his guy takes on rednecks at a bar. That's true.

SPEAKER_04 21:28

But you didn't include that in your argument. You're right. I should have had a more open mind. Darn you, Brad Pitt. Beautiful hair.

SPEAKER_02 21:40

Not as beautiful as Patrick Swayze, though. No, that man agreed here. We are now in round seven. Dalton has advanced.

SPEAKER_04 21:47

Alright, so I'm a judge now.

SPEAKER_02 21:50

Um new location.

SPEAKER_04 21:56

Submarine! Okay. So it's Dalton Virginia. Versus who, Mitch?

SPEAKER_03 22:01

Dirty Harry.

SPEAKER_02 22:04

Well, need I say more. Does Dirty Harry have a 44 Magnum?

SPEAKER_01 22:11

No.

SPEAKER_02 22:12

Dalton.

SPEAKER_04 22:14

Mitch, do you want to try anything?

SPEAKER_01 22:16

Dirty Harry's rugged. He's just gonna he's gonna eat them bullets, or he's just gonna eat them fists and come back with more.

SPEAKER_02 22:22

Dirty Harry gets the snoppy out of them in a lot of these movies.

SPEAKER_01 22:26

I ain't got nothing for you.

SPEAKER_02 22:27

Have you used a weapon yet, Mitch?

SPEAKER_01 22:29

No.

SPEAKER_04 22:30

Do you wanna?

SPEAKER_01 22:31

No.

SPEAKER_04 22:31

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 22:32

I have other people that might need them. Look, these are the worst people on my list.

SPEAKER_04 22:36

Alright. So. Okay, well, so we're done arguing. Pretty much. Sorry, Clinton, you spoiled your dead.

SPEAKER_01 22:44

But as soon as I drew that name, I was like, there's nothing he can do against most of these people.

SPEAKER_04 22:49

Man, uh Dalton gave him a weapon. Dalton's cleaning house.

SPEAKER_02 22:54

Road house.

SPEAKER_04 22:56

There it is.

SPEAKER_02 22:58

Dalton advances it. So that's he's he's made it four rounds. He's on his fourth run.

SPEAKER_04 23:04

Alright. So it's well, it's me, but you're still judging. I guess.

SPEAKER_01 23:10

No, yeah. I mean, y'all would just and then I would go with the next one, whoever wins.

SPEAKER_04 23:14

Okay. So 11 is a sinking ship. So it's me versus Dalton still, right? It's you versus Dalton, though. All right. Uh Brian Mills. I don't know who that is. That is Liam Neeson's character. Okay, let I can do it for I can pick up the mirror. Alright, all right, gotcha. How many Roadhouse movies are there? One. Oh, just one Roadhouse movies? How many token movies are there? Taked.

SPEAKER_03 23:38

How many times did Liam Neeson get taked? Three.

SPEAKER_02 23:41

He's clearly a horrible bodyguard. And a TV show, okay? Not featuring Liam Neeson.

SPEAKER_04 23:47

But he's so legendary that they spawned a TV show because of him. Yes. And his particular set of skills do translate very well into sequels. Alright. Yeah, he needs to practice a little bit better guardianship of his, you know. Of his daughter. But other than my family. You know. He's killed people with what where were we at? A sunken ship? We are on a sinking boat. Okay, so like random objects, and you know, and he's fought in water before, Liam Neeson has.

SPEAKER_02 24:13

He did fight on a boat. It wasn't sinking, but he was on a boat.

SPEAKER_04 24:16

That is true. You know, all sorts of things. I feel like given the uh the experience that he has, also trained killing uh assassins and whatnot, retired and still back in the game because he's pissed off. So I assume that Dalton's.

SPEAKER_02 24:30

But this time his daughter hasn't been taken.

SPEAKER_04 24:32

I assume that Dalton did take his daughter. That's why he's pissed off.

SPEAKER_02 24:35

At least that's what we're gonna tell him. That's what we told him when he got there. You see that handsome man?

SPEAKER_04 24:40

Yeah, he took your daughter. And and he already had the phone call with uh with Patrick Swayze, and you know, he told him about his particular set of skills.

SPEAKER_02 24:47

So and Patrick Swayze told him he gets off work at 11.

SPEAKER_04 24:50

And boats have batteries. Alright. So okay so he could, you know. Tie him up and electrocute him. Exactly.

SPEAKER_02 24:57

On a sinking boat, it's just gonna sink anyway.

SPEAKER_04 24:59

He's gonna get the information that he needs. There is no information. Alright, so he kills assassins. He's really good with random objects, and uh he's pissed off because Dalton took his daughter.

SPEAKER_02 25:10

I mean, Dalton, also a martial art skilled person. Yeah, uh-huh. Able to use weapons or surrounding weapons of opportunity far younger and faster.

SPEAKER_04 25:22

When did he use surrounding weapons of opportunity in Roadhouse?

SPEAKER_02 25:26

Did you not watch the movie? The beer bottle, beer bottles, coffee cups, stools, chairs, tables. The randomness of the dude who had a knife on his boot and he beat him up and took the boot from him.

SPEAKER_04 25:38

The randomness of the taking random objects, I think, are more prevalent.

SPEAKER_02 25:42

I think it would be uh a smorgasbord for Dalton because now he has a whole plethora of different things to hit people with a roundhouse kicking beast in the face.

SPEAKER_04 25:50

Brian Mills is a lot more creative.

SPEAKER_02 25:52

I think Dalton could be as creative, and he's far younger.

SPEAKER_04 25:55

Alright, Mitch, what do you have?

SPEAKER_01 26:00

I kind of gotta go with Dalton. Yeah! Why, Mitch? Because I feel like Brian Mills, he he's good when he surprises people. He's good at looking up information and flipping.

SPEAKER_03 26:10

It's a sinking ship. He could you know disappear and surprise him whenever he wants to dive in the water and could become surprise. Because Dalton's just gonna stand on a sinking boat, like, well, this is stupid.

SPEAKER_01 26:18

I just feel like he's better when he surprises the people. All right.

SPEAKER_02 26:22

We're now entering round nine. Dalton on an unprecedented run.

SPEAKER_04 26:27

He still has nine people left, Mitch. I know. By the way, listeners, if if one person gets away, like Tom does, and me and Mitch are down to like two or three people left in our list, we can initiate excommunicato and then send two people to fight his one guy. So me and Mitch can have two.

SPEAKER_02 26:47

Dalton does fight multiple people at once.

SPEAKER_04 26:48

Oh, well, we're not there yet, so just throwing it out there. All right. What happens now? Who's uh who's up next? I'm the judge. Uh yeah.

McClain Stops Road House Momentum

SPEAKER_04 26:55

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 26:55

You're fighting John McClain.

SPEAKER_02 26:58

Dalton. Come on. Where are they fighting? I didn't roll for it yet. You write John McClain and not John McCain. Throwbacks! 13. We don't jungle. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 27:14

And I'm gonna give him the suppressed MP5.

SPEAKER_02 27:16

Oh snap. Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 27:18

You're giving a weapon, huh? John McLean is good with a weapon. Yes. And what's the only submachine guns?

SPEAKER_02 27:25

Huh.

SPEAKER_01 27:30

Welcome to the potty, pal.

SPEAKER_04 27:33

Are you using a weapon there, Tam? Are you using a weapon, Tom?

SPEAKER_03 27:41

What was that crossing?

SPEAKER_01 27:45

Just say it, Tom. If you don't even use a weapon, you ain't got a chance.

SPEAKER_02 27:49

But it's a jungle, it's cluttered. There's multiple trees, vines, and away.

SPEAKER_01 27:53

And I can use a suppressed weapon from a distance.

SPEAKER_04 27:55

You're not using a weapon, huh?

SPEAKER_02 27:56

No.

SPEAKER_04 27:58

Dog works.

SPEAKER_03 28:00

I am now listening to your arguments.

SPEAKER_02 28:03

Tom, you may go first. A, John McClain has to get close enough to get to him. B, he's not wearing shoes, so he's gonna be just be stepping on stuff and go, ooh, ah, because it is diehard one. He left his shoes in the room. Two, it is a vast different environment than John McClain is used to fighting in. It's not a hotel. You have multiple changes of elevation, different trees of size, vines, cover, concealments that he will have to get through to just get to Dalton.

SPEAKER_04 28:30

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 28:31

And Dalton can navigate more easily. He's not trying to walk around with a suppressed MP5, because which we know, as suppressed, if they're close enough and John McClain shoots, he'll hear it and be able to move quicker.

SPEAKER_01 28:40

Well, he's not shooting at other people, he's shooting at him.

SPEAKER_02 28:44

And John McClain is not a great hand-to-hand combatant because he was getting the snot kicked out of him a lot. Okay. In that movie.

SPEAKER_01 28:54

Um, one, the same thing Tom said about the location. Dalton has never been in the jungle fighting in a jungle.

SPEAKER_02 29:00

You don't know his life. Okay. You don't know what he did before Rhodes.

SPEAKER_01 29:03

You know, you know, Goodwill, he's wearing a black shirt and blue jeans and cowboy boots in the jungle.

SPEAKER_04 29:08

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 29:09

For uh, you know, Dalton over there, but John McClain, he takes out multiple, you know, terrorists covertly inside of a skyscraper. So I'm pretty sure if he can do it in a skyscraper with a gun.

SPEAKER_02 29:21

He has to shoot him.

SPEAKER_01 29:22

He has a gun. He has an MP5. So he doesn't have to get close. All right. He just has to get you in sight.

SPEAKER_04 29:27

I'll bring it down to the slogan. I think guns is kind of ruining the what's what's the kill slogan that that uh Dalton says? In Roanhood? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:37

Oh, he doesn't say anything.

SPEAKER_04 29:38

Exactly. So John McClain wins.

SPEAKER_03 29:41

He doesn't have a good cliche. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 29:44

So John McLean wins. It was a good run, Dalton. In an unproductive one, two, three, four, five rounds. Good for him. Dalton has been defeated. And we now enter round done.

SPEAKER_04 29:57

Alright, so it's John McClain versus Mike Lowry. No idea. Okay. Which one is that? That's uh uh Will Smith. Yeah. So all right, John McLean. What did you say his name? Mike Lowry.

SPEAKER_01 30:12

Where are they fighting at?

SPEAKER_04 30:13

That's true. Where are they fighting at?

SPEAKER_02 30:17

Oh no, you talk. There was no night. Eight, we did eight. Nine. Very large men's room.

SPEAKER_04 30:25

Okay. I feel like given the uh the urbanness of this terrain, Mike Lowry would win because all of his fight all of his fights are very urban, you know territory.

SPEAKER_02 30:40

Same could be said for John McClain.

SPEAKER_04 30:42

Yeah, but like you said though, John McClain is very dependent on firearms. You know, Mike Lowry, he could hold himself. Plus he's taller, stronger, bigger, has better hair. John McClain's hair.

SPEAKER_01 30:53

John McClain's John McClain's tougher. You know, Michael Lowry, he got shot and went down. John McClain just goes, ah!

SPEAKER_02 30:58

He got shot, beaten up, blown up, thrown, lit on fire, broken glass, and he's like.

SPEAKER_04 31:06

But Mike Lowry has so much to live for. He's got to get back to whatever Martin Lawrence has got going on in his life.

SPEAKER_01 31:12

So is John McClain. He's got to get back to his daughter.

SPEAKER_04 31:14

No, his family leaves him. Like every movie is just more and more depressing for John McClain.

SPEAKER_01 31:18

Yeah, but they're still around. He's still got to be there for him.

SPEAKER_04 31:22

Mike Lowry's he's a good, stable family person who's able to like support his friends and their marriages.

SPEAKER_01 31:28

I've never seen Mike Lowry fight anybody hand to hand.

SPEAKER_04 31:32

Yeah, but he's because he wins. So it has to just shoot him. Yeah, exactly.

SPEAKER_01 31:36

But does he have a gun? Uh no. Okay, then.

SPEAKER_04 31:40

He doesn't need a gun.

SPEAKER_01 31:41

John McLean doesn't have a gun, but he doesn't need a gun. He's fought people hand to hand at once. It's very it's very sloppy, though. But he wins.

SPEAKER_04 31:48

I feel like he does win. I feel like uh there would be a lot of things that Mike Lowry would have in his advantage. Like he wouldn't lose his shoes in the middle of this fight. You know, um, he wouldn't put himself in like an air duct to get trapped in there or anything like that, you know.

SPEAKER_01 32:04

Neither one would. They're in a bathroom. A very large bathroom.

SPEAKER_04 32:07

It's a very large bathroom. Okay. Big old bathroom. Big big toilets. Plenty of blunt objects to beat each other up with.

SPEAKER_02 32:13

Plenty of sinks to get your head hit on top.

SPEAKER_01 32:15

John McLean is good at hiding, so he could just like knock Will Smith or Mike Lowry down, hide in a stall, wait for him to walk by, and then kick the door open, hit him in the face.

SPEAKER_04 32:22

But he's gotta knock him down first. That's not gonna happen.

SPEAKER_01 32:25

Oh, yeah.

unknown 32:26

All right.

SPEAKER_01 32:26

Mike Lowry's gonna be too tied up in his suit and his looks. He's gonna be trying to stay pretty. John McClain's gonna get down and get in the gritty, gitty gritty with it.

SPEAKER_04 32:33

This is my argument. That's where I'm at.

SPEAKER_02 32:35

Any other any closing remarks?

SPEAKER_04 32:38

Uh just remember that if you kill Mike Lowry, you're racist, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 32:46

John McClain doesn't see color, he just fights and kills them all.

SPEAKER_02 32:51

And he does make quicker decisions, doesn't give a lot of exposition.

SPEAKER_01 32:54

Yeah, yeah. And again, Mike Lowry, I've never seen him fight anyone in any movie hand to hand.

SPEAKER_02 33:00

Except Chris Rock. Oh, wait a minute. I gotta give it to John McClain. Oh it's not gonna be pretty, but I think John McLean is the one that wants to. John McLean walks out of that bathroom.

SPEAKER_04 33:21

Alright. I'm a judge now.

SPEAKER_01 33:24

Now, if it was if it was uh Will Smith from uh Muhammad Ali, that'd have been a different story.

SPEAKER_04 33:30

That's not really like an action hero movie. No.

SPEAKER_01 33:32

I know, but he'd be he'd be Muhammad Ali.

SPEAKER_02 33:34

Yeah, it would just be Muhammad Ali. That really wouldn't be fair. Uh Chance B. Who's Chance B, Mesh? That was your guy.

SPEAKER_01 33:41

Chance B. Oh, Chance Boudreaux. Yeah. Chunkla Van Damme from Hard Target.

SPEAKER_04 33:46

I've never seen that movie.

SPEAKER_01 33:49

Basically, think of somebody like the transporter. It's pretty much similar. Okay. As far as like skill and all that.

SPEAKER_04 33:58

What are they fighting? We're gonna have to come up with more locations. Or just Old West Main Street. Alright.

SPEAKER_01 34:07

Whatever you roll, just go with whatever he lands on.

SPEAKER_04 34:10

So like a dirty roadway between saloons. At high noon. At high noon. Alright. Alright. Uh I'm listening to your arguments. Go ahead.

SPEAKER_01 34:22

John McLean McLean fights dirty. He'll throw dirt in his eyes.

SPEAKER_02 34:26

I feel like Chance B would do the same. I also feel that Chance B is a far superior hand-to-hand combatant. And since you have not chosen a weapon, nor have I, it would be basically Jean-Claude Van Damme just spinning, kicking John Bruce Willis' butt up.

SPEAKER_03 34:44

You can't agree with him. Sorry!

SPEAKER_01 34:50

I mean, what is John McClain gonna do against Jean-Claude Van Damme? Okay. Jean-Claude Van Damme with a mullet.

SPEAKER_02 34:58

Oh, but that's plus time. Wait, what year was this movie? Because that depends also how coked out it was Jean-Claude Van Damme.

SPEAKER_01 35:04

Early 90s. Oh man.

SPEAKER_03 35:07

He ain't feeling nothing.

SPEAKER_04 35:10

So I I guess uh we all three agree that uh bye, John McClain.

SPEAKER_03 35:14

Goodbye, John McClane.

SPEAKER_01 35:20

Yeah, John McLean. I gave him the one gun just to get rid of uh Dalton from Roadhouse. Just because already we're finishing this right now.

SPEAKER_04 35:34

Alright.

Van Damme Runs Into Jackie Chan

SPEAKER_04 35:35

What are we fighting? Tell you in a minute. You just gotta have to start taking re-rolls, man.

SPEAKER_01 35:41

Just roll whatever the first one goes to.

SPEAKER_02 35:45

Uh 15 library.

SPEAKER_04 35:47

Okay. Uh so Chance B versus investigator Chan. Which is Jackie Chan. Ooh. I'll let you go first.

SPEAKER_01 35:59

It's Jackie Chan from SuperCOP.

SPEAKER_02 36:00

I'll let you go first, Mitch. Oh, it's not him from like Russia? You two. Oh, okay. Yeah, you just gave me the person. And you're like, Mitch. Tell him. I was gonna let him make the argument for me.

SPEAKER_04 36:12

Uh okay, well, I'll go first. So we all know that Jackie Chan is the master of improvised weapons. I mean, you've seen all of his movies. Were they fighting that? A library? A library. Yeah. Imagine like those like there's a lot of chairs. Yeah, the chairs, the tumble ladders that like slides, you know, the awnings, all sorts of things. The stamp. Yep, the stampy thing. You know, all those books. Library cards. Like basically ninja stars. So, you know.

SPEAKER_01 36:38

I just want to point out that for somebody that's so argumentative, he is very bad at debating. It's just like, I hate a while.

SPEAKER_02 36:47

Because I win.

SPEAKER_04 36:48

That's why Yeah, I I think it's some good points. He's good at improvised weapons, you know, and he's he's good at fighting people of all sizes. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 36:55

You know, and uh he could do that weird wall skip thing that's right, and between the corners.

SPEAKER_04 37:00

Uh Jean-Claude Van Damme may be really good at kicks, but he he's originally a ballet dancer. That's why he's able to do splits. Jackie Chan, martial arts trained from the master himself in some movies. Bruce Lee, you know, yeah. I I give it a Jackie Chan.

SPEAKER_01 37:20

What character?

SPEAKER_02 37:21

I I never saw the movie of the guy I'm using. So, I mean, I'm just going off that it's like kind of like the transporter, but it's Jean-Claude Van Damme in the 90s with a mullet coked out. Uh, is that the way he beats up all the dudes and he's got like the trench coat on?

SPEAKER_04 37:36

No, that's time cop. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 37:38

Is it? Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 37:38

No, no, no, that's hard target too.

SPEAKER_04 37:40

Oh, is it? Oh, he has the same image.

SPEAKER_01 37:43

Yeah, same image.

SPEAKER_02 37:44

Yeah, but 90s Jean-Claude Van Damme. Yeah. So coked out he doesn't even know what's going on. So to him, this is just a simulation in the matrix. He just thinks this is this is what's happening to him that day because he just did five grand worth of blow in the bathroom of a library.

SPEAKER_04 37:59

And we we all know that Jean-Claude Van Damme is a huge prima donna back in the 90s. He quit movies because he he didn't have his face seen enough. Jackie Chan broke bones, every bone in his body for his roles.

SPEAKER_01 38:11

More than once.

SPEAKER_04 38:12

More than once. So much tougher in a fight.

SPEAKER_01 38:17

Any any final thoughts, Tom? Nope. I'm just picturing like Jean-Claude jumping up, doing a split between two shelves, and then Jackie Chan just coming from different sides of the shelves.

SPEAKER_04 38:29

Kicking the chairs out from under his feet.

SPEAKER_01 38:33

So yeah, I think uh Mr. Chan wins.

SPEAKER_04 38:36

I think that's like the first one of one.

SPEAKER_01 38:39

Now you won Ripley at the beginning.

SPEAKER_04 38:40

Oh, that's right. I had to give her a gun, though.

SPEAKER_02 38:50

Alright. Investigator Chan advances.

SPEAKER_03 38:53

Yay.

SPEAKER_04 38:54

Alright, now uh Mitch. Mitch, who do you have against Investigator Chan?

SPEAKER_01 38:59

John Spartan. Ooh. From Demolition Band.

SPEAKER_04 39:03

Alright. Where are they fighting? Yeah, where are they fighting? Quit rolling high rolls. This is DD. 11.

SPEAKER_02 39:16

Sinking ship.

SPEAKER_04 39:17

Okay. Are you gonna give a weapon? No. Sinking ship. Thinking ship. Let me look at my weapon. I've used AR10. I'm gonna give him nunchucks. Oh, that's right. Mention you suppressed MP5.

SPEAKER_02 39:43

You were gonna give the nunchucks to investigator Chan.

SPEAKER_04 39:47

That's right. Jackie Chan has nunchucks. You know he's basically undefeated. But he's in the water. Uh he could be in the water. On a sinking boat. It's it is maybe sinking. I'm I'm picturing more like waist high, which is like good nunchuck, you know, whipping range. Whipping. Whipping.

SPEAKER_02 40:05

Why am I trying to argue with this with you?

SPEAKER_04 40:08

I I I feel like uh I don't need to say much more. Close range, you know, canted environment because the the that's that's the chaos screams, Jackie Chan. He's totally gonna win in a situation like that.

SPEAKER_01 40:20

John Spartan takes out in his prime Wesley Snipes.

SPEAKER_04 40:24

Yeah, but where's Wesley Snipes on this list?

SPEAKER_01 40:26

He's a bad guy, he's not on the list. Exactly.

SPEAKER_04 40:28

We didn't do bad guys. So I I feel like given the the way things are, and basically since uh Demolition Man's a science fiction movie.

SPEAKER_01 40:36

I didn't pick the guy, I just got stuck with him. Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_04 40:41

I I feel like Jackie Chan would win. Just saying. He's got all the elements in his face.

SPEAKER_01 40:45

I mean, John Spark, if he could get a hold of him, he could just hold him underwater and drown him.

SPEAKER_04 40:49

A weapon, chaotic environment, you know, he's gonna win.

SPEAKER_01 40:58

It's been a while since I've seen Demolition, man. I'm trying to think, what has he survived?

SPEAKER_02 41:06

Beating up multiple people simultaneously. Taco Bell.

SPEAKER_04 41:11

The three shells.

SPEAKER_02 41:12

The three shells.

SPEAKER_01 41:15

Um I mean, the nunchucks would be hard to overcome.

SPEAKER_00 41:20

There you go.

SPEAKER_01 41:21

But but I think he could take the hits, uh, at least a few hits from it, enough to get within, you know.

SPEAKER_02 41:27

To grab him?

SPEAKER_01 41:28

Yeah, to grab him. And then if he could grab him and just hold him down under the water, Jackie Chan can't get away.

SPEAKER_04 41:34

But Jackie Chan's squirmy.

SPEAKER_01 41:35

He's not gonna get away in the water.

SPEAKER_04 41:36

He's got all these crazy kicks and flips and stuff that he can do to get out of that.

SPEAKER_01 41:39

Where are you gonna do that on a sinking ship?

SPEAKER_04 41:41

If the ship's sinking, there's water. That's his forte, is he like always gets out of insurmountable odds. And he's got he doesn't get plot devices. And he's got nunchucks. That's all he is is plot devices. Oh, I need to jump, you know, off this three-story running to grab an electric pole with lights and slide my way down.

SPEAKER_01 42:02

John Spartan improvises. He'll grab like the uh the life preserver, the little one, and just you know, block the nunchups.

SPEAKER_04 42:09

When Stallone got punched really hard by Dolph Lungering in that Rocky movie. He's not fighting Dolph Lungering. But when he did, what happened to Stallone?

SPEAKER_01 42:16

It doesn't matter. That's not this.

SPEAKER_04 42:18

He got sent to the hospital. When Jackie Chan gets a broken rib or a concussion or whatever, what happens to Jackie Chan? He goes to the hospital. He finishes the movie.

SPEAKER_01 42:25

No, he goes to the hospital and then he goes back and finishes the movie.

SPEAKER_04 42:27

There's plenty of stories where Jackie Chan has all these crazy injuries he needs to finish.

SPEAKER_01 42:30

That's all nice and well, but we're not talking about Rocky. We're talking about John Spartan. The man who single-handedly takes out a terrorist organization to go and get Wesley Snipes before.

SPEAKER_02 42:40

We make out with Sandra Bullock.

SPEAKER_04 42:43

I've rest my case. Nunchucks, Jackie Chan, Cadik Environment.

SPEAKER_01 42:47

I think John Spartan can improvise, grab something to block the nunchucks, and get a hold of the channel. He can't even understand how to work the three shells.

SPEAKER_02 42:53

Can you?

SPEAKER_01 42:57

No one knew what it meant. Alright, Tom.

SPEAKER_02 43:03

This is the hardest decision he's ever had to make. This is like trying to order dinner. I mean, yes, Chan is fast. Yes, he has non-jokes. Spartan has fought people with weapons and taking them from them.

SPEAKER_01 43:21

There's boat oars, there's stuff that John Spartan can grab.

SPEAKER_02 43:29

This is the this is tough. This is probably the toughest one. Because they're even in their own ways.

Bruce Lee Enters The Tower

SPEAKER_02 43:43

He's a nimble fellow. We're now in round fourteen.

SPEAKER_04 43:49

Alright, so I would be judging now, but my fighter's still out there, so what happens now?

SPEAKER_01 43:55

Now I judge while you choose you too.

SPEAKER_04 43:58

I choose my next. Alright. If it makes you feel any better, he did break the nunchucks on John Spartan.

SPEAKER_02 44:07

Big lugging heads. I have Lee. Who's Lee? Bruce Lee. Bruce Lee from Ender the Dragon. Alright. I've already used their melee weapon. I have no opening argument. Because isn't this the one who taught Jackie Chan?

SPEAKER_04 44:28

Where are we fighting first? Where are we fighting? Does it matter? Yes. I gotta start formulating my argument.

SPEAKER_02 44:35

Seven.

SPEAKER_04 44:38

Alright, I feel like Jackie Chan. I feel like Jackie Chan's smaller than Bruce Lee. Maybe. Bruce Lee wasn't that big. I don't know. But he's more squirrely than Bruce Lee. You know. And between the two of them, I think Jackie Chan could figure out a submarine first.

SPEAKER_02 44:58

I think Bruce Lee could beat the crap out of Jackie Chan before Jackie Chan gets the chance to figure out how to work a submarine.

SPEAKER_03 45:05

The only person that could kill Jackie Chan in this list.

SPEAKER_02 45:11

It's like who's gonna win? Dracula? Wouldn't stick.

SPEAKER_03 45:16

It's Bruce Lee.

SPEAKER_02 45:18

He killed Chuck Norris. Yeah, you know.

SPEAKER_04 45:20

Yeah, he did. Alright, alright. I still stand by my, you know. Yeah. Jackie Chan's gonna set up the nuke to take them both out.

SPEAKER_02 45:30

And the in the submarine. He's just gonna be like, I'm taking you with he's gonna pull a predator. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 45:36

Tom, anything else?

SPEAKER_02 45:38

It's Bruce Lee. How many people did he beat up in Under the Dragon? I mean, multiple people with weapons. And he's just fighting Jackie Chan, who he taught. He already knows what he's gonna do because he showed him it.

SPEAKER_04 45:49

It's not very using my argument, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 45:54

I'm dead. You're done? Yes. Yeah, I gotta go, Bruce Lee. No. Thank you. But it's kind of in my own reasoning, too. They're on a sub, so where's Jackie Chan gonna do his flips and stuff at? There's a there's a hallway. Yeah, I hear you. And he's got the one-inch punch flip and just hit his head on a bulkhead. Bruce Lee has that one-inch punch. He doesn't need a lot of space.

SPEAKER_04 46:13

That's true, he does have the one-inch punch. Alright, I'm judging now.

SPEAKER_01 46:18

Now I've got to fight Bruce Lee.

SPEAKER_04 46:19

Yes, he must be getting Bruce Lee. Who do you got?

SPEAKER_01 46:23

Luke Hobbs, which is the rot from Fast the Furious. That's okay. He has plot.

SPEAKER_02 46:29

He does. Luke Hobbs Lee, the number 14. Old West Main Street.

SPEAKER_04 46:35

Alright. I'm ready.

SPEAKER_02 46:39

I'm giving it's obviously gonna be Bruce Lee. He's gonna beat The Rock. Yes, The Rock is bigger. He is stronger.

SPEAKER_01 46:47

But we're not talking about The Rock. We're talking about Luke Hobbs. The guy who's like it's based on The Rock. The guy who Luke Hobbs fought Dominic Toretto and the guy hit him in the face with a wrench and he just kept on fighting.

SPEAKER_02 46:58

Overweight, buff, bald, Vin Diesel.

SPEAKER_01 47:01

He got hit in the face with a wrench, like with the head the size of a person's head. And he just kept on coming. He's knocking people through cinder block walls.

SPEAKER_04 47:12

Is there any weapons being used in this?

SPEAKER_01 47:15

None that would benefit Luke Hobbs.

SPEAKER_02 47:19

I mean, I feel like Bruce Lee doesn't need a weapon. He is a weapon. He is a weapon. He is the weapon.

SPEAKER_04 47:25

You have any melee weapons or anything you want to give him?

SPEAKER_01 47:27

I think Luke Hobbs could continue to put him through like the the.

SPEAKER_02 47:31

I think Bruce Lee is faster and far more nimble and well trained to easily block anything Luke Hobbs throws at him, dodge it, counter it, and hit him, and continue to beat him until he just eventually goes down from exhaustion and broken ribs.

SPEAKER_01 47:47

I think as soon as Bruce Lee goes to kick Luke Hobbs, he grabs him by the leg and swings him through the post on the porch.

SPEAKER_02 47:54

And Bruce Lee does a backflip in mid-air. Like uh plants on the Once Upon a Time in Hollywood kind of thing.

SPEAKER_04 47:59

Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 48:01

I just I just see Luke Hobbs putting him through windows. Can I finish a sentence? No. Just one sentence. I see him putting him through windows. I see him putting him through posts on the front porch of these places. I just I don't see him surviving being thrown through multiple walls.

SPEAKER_04 48:20

How tall is the rock?

SPEAKER_01 48:22

He's like six five.

SPEAKER_04 48:23

Okay, how tall is Bruce Lee? I don't know, but we can find out. Let's find out. Let's see.

SPEAKER_01 48:27

So Rock's either six four or six five.

SPEAKER_04 48:30

So that's pretty tall. What would you say? Like 300 pounds?

SPEAKER_01 48:34

Uh I think he's like around 280 something. Yeah. Pure muscle. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 48:39

Bruce Lee is five foot eight. So he's like a foot.

SPEAKER_01 48:41

A foot taller almost. Half a foot taller.

SPEAKER_04 48:46

You sure you don't want to do a weapon there, Tom?

SPEAKER_02 48:49

Bruce Lee holds the world record for kicking a 135-kilogram sandbag to the ceiling, which was about five meters high.

SPEAKER_01 48:57

That's Bruce Lee. That's that doesn't say Lee from Enter the Dragon. Did he do that in Enter the Dragon? I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 49:02

Did you see any bags from the kick? But no, he could do it.

SPEAKER_01 49:06

I mean, I'm not taking the rock. Bruce Lee and Enter the King beats up big people. Well, in Scorpion King, the rock turned into a Scorpion. I mean, I can't use other movies outside of the game.

SPEAKER_02 49:15

I'm talking about the movie he we were meant using in Enter the Dragon.

SPEAKER_01 49:19

What did he do?

SPEAKER_02 49:20

He beats up people bigger than him.

SPEAKER_04 49:22

What's the craziest thing that uh Hobbes does? Not in a vehicle.

SPEAKER_01 49:27

I mean, in the movie Hobbes and Shaw, he like he literally takes people in like like concrete walls. He's like punching holes in them and knocking them, knocking people through the wall. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 49:38

Let us also preface this. This is a fast and furious movie. Doesn't matter.

SPEAKER_01 49:41

That's part of the movie.

SPEAKER_02 49:42

This was based on real martial arts.

SPEAKER_01 49:44

We're arguing about characters, not actors.

SPEAKER_04 49:46

Alright. If there's no weapons being issued to these fighters, I have made my decision. I'm gonna go for the guy that's a foot tall and probably 150 pounds heavier than Bruce Lee. Sorry. You're a fool.

SPEAKER_01 49:59

Just saying, we're not arguing the actors. We're arguing the characters from the movie.

SPEAKER_04 50:03

And and if they're uh if they're just in the open nothing of a street where it's just fists on feet and stuff like that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 50:10

But think of how much room Lee would have to move.

SPEAKER_04 50:13

Yeah. So but he still has to close a distance to touch him at some point. Oh yeah. Quickly. And then he grabs him and then it's it's over. Maybe I'm wrong, but this is what I guess.

SPEAKER_01 50:24

Like I was saying, he took a wrench to the face from Dominic Toretto with hardly any effect.

SPEAKER_02 50:29

Well, well.

SPEAKER_04 50:33

Alright, so it's my turn.

Hobbs Falls Then Riggs Surges

SPEAKER_02 50:35

Yeah, it's gonna be you against Mitch.

SPEAKER_04 50:37

Number two.

SPEAKER_02 50:38

Subway station fight. Alright, I have Martin Riggs.

SPEAKER_01 50:43

He's not much bigger than Bruce Lee.

SPEAKER_04 50:47

But Martin Riggs is crazy. He is crazy. I think he would like stand out in the subway area waiting for Hops to come fight him. You know? What are you gonna do? You know. Is he really? Taller than Bruce Lee. He would do the three Stooges things too, like slap his face and stuff like that, trying to like goat him in there.

SPEAKER_02 51:19

So the rock would Luke Hobbs would only be uh half six inches taller than Martin Riggs.

SPEAKER_04 51:24

Alright. I think uh as crazy as Martin Riggs is and as as like careless forces about yeah, special forces and careless about his life, you know, way more than Hobbes is, you would have the upper hand.

SPEAKER_02 51:39

I'm just saying You are so bad at articulate.

SPEAKER_01 51:42

If you want to argue about Martin people fighting, hand to hand, Jet Lee beat up uh Martin Riggs and what's the other guy? Uh the standard brother?

SPEAKER_04 51:53

But it's not Jet Lee, though.

SPEAKER_01 51:54

But a guy that's martial arts beat up both of them.

SPEAKER_04 51:57

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_01 51:58

And we just said that Luke Hobbs beats Bruce Lee in a hand-to-hand fight.

SPEAKER_02 52:01

Yeah, but Martin Riggs killed him in the movie. That's right.

SPEAKER_01 52:05

Only because they fell into water.

SPEAKER_04 52:06

And he fought under the Yeah, they fought in a terrain that was more neutral, like I don't know, a subway station where there's trains barreling down.

SPEAKER_01 52:15

And there was two on one.

SPEAKER_04 52:16

Okay. So he's got the train on his side. All right.

SPEAKER_01 52:19

No, it's just Luke Hobbs. He just threw you in front of the train.

SPEAKER_04 52:22

Luke Hobbs would be more scared of the train than Martin Riggs would be because Martin's around vehicles all the time. No, Martin Riggs is crazy. He's not worried about being ran over by a train. In fact, he welcomes it. He's not even worried about getting shot. He's suicidal.

SPEAKER_01 52:34

Luke Hobbs jumps out of a building and falls down onto the little like window washer thing. And then when that wasn't far enough, he jumped off of that and landed onto the little awning to get to this people that were trying to get away.

SPEAKER_04 52:46

All right, Martin Riggs has an RPG.

SPEAKER_01 53:01

Well, again, at least we got that out of the way. I mean, I have no more argument.

SPEAKER_02 53:09

No, no. If that be the case.

SPEAKER_01 53:13

Although Luke Hobbs has survived multiple explosions in all the fast- I just want to say how precise Martin Riggs is with his firing, with firearms.

SPEAKER_04 53:22

Okay. If he hits directly with an RPG, there's no surviving that.

SPEAKER_01 53:25

Can we have like dual knockouts in this? Because if you shoot a RPG in a subway, it might make the whole thing collapse on top of him.

SPEAKER_04 53:31

No. Do you have any idea?

SPEAKER_01 53:33

Shut up, just go.

SPEAKER_04 53:35

It's like a grenade explosion. I know. It's like a 10-meter explosion.

SPEAKER_01 53:37

I'm just trying to convince Tom to find some way out of this.

SPEAKER_02 53:41

So yeah, Luke Hobbs is a ridiculous character. Pure fantasy, pretty much. He might as well be a superhero.

SPEAKER_04 53:49

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 53:50

Martin Riggs is actually a special forces Vietnam vet. Cop on the ragged edge. Great hand-to-hand training. Mm-hmm. With an RPG. Great with weapons. And an RPG. Yeah. Has made kill shots at over a thousand meters or a mile. Something like that. Yeah. Um. Diplomatic immunity. It's been revoked. You know it's uh Martellas has it, but yeah. And an RPG. In an enclosed environment. Plus the shrapnel of all the ceramic. I mean, Lou Cobbs would probably just shake it off. If it was the movie. But I would give this to Martin Riggs. Oh, thank you, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 54:35

I mean, once you gave him an RPG, it's kind of like, yeah. It's kind of like when you're when there's nowhere to go, you're in a subway and he's got an RPG. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 54:42

I tried making my case with that. It wasn't going anywhere. So I was like, nah, get a thing. Martin. Freaking Riggs. Freaking Riggs. Alright, so it's him versus you now, Tom.

SPEAKER_01 54:54

No, it's you versus two. Martin Riggs versus whoever Tom's gonna say.

SPEAKER_04 54:59

Martin Riggs is in him. You sure you know what's going on?

SPEAKER_01 55:01

Yep.

SPEAKER_02 55:03

Okay. We now advance to Indiana Jones. He has a better theme song. He has a whip. No, he doesn't. How many Nazis have you seen Indiana Jones? Where are we fighting?

SPEAKER_01 55:21

Where are we fighting first? If it's a jungle, Indiana Jones wins.

SPEAKER_02 55:25

13 jungles.

SPEAKER_03 55:30

But Vietnam, all right, Vietnam veteran, special forces Vietnam veteran in the jungle.

SPEAKER_04 55:38

So I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure.

SPEAKER_02 55:41

The resourcefulness of Indiana Jones. How many he has taken on multiple people simultaneously and beaten the snot out of multiple Nazis, plus those dudes from Temple of Doom, I don't remember what they were called, and Russians at an advanced age, but we're obviously talking Indiana Prime.

SPEAKER_04 55:56

All right. First off, Indiana Jones 4 doesn't count because that's not a real movie. All right. And second off.

SPEAKER_02 56:01

And how many sounds did you hear with him punching dudes right in the jaw?

SPEAKER_04 56:05

Second off, all right. Indiana Jones, you know, he doesn't actively go out to kill people. Martin Riggs, it's a it's a ride or die situation for him. Okay. If he's on the case, somebody's dying. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 56:19

And if he's The same could be said for Indiana?

SPEAKER_04 56:21

I don't think so. Indiana Jones only cares about, you know, getting something and getting out. And usually all of his plots revolve into they devolve into him like just meddling in something that didn't matter, anyways, because whatever he's trying to get didn't matter by the end of the movie, anyways.

SPEAKER_02 56:36

Why are you blinking so much? I'm trying to formulate my words here. It's like he's going insane. Like his left eye is just like, alright, alright, alright, don't care.

SPEAKER_04 56:44

So like uh, yeah, and what he's trying to kill or who he's trying to get past to get the Ark of the Covenant didn't matter.

SPEAKER_02 56:50

He threatened to blow up everybody, including the Ark and himself, with an RPG that didn't exist yet. Yeah. But so he is willing to make the sacrifice.

SPEAKER_04 56:58

But Martin Riggs has more experience in the jungle, he has more experience killing, and he has more capability of killing.

SPEAKER_02 57:04

Indiana Jones has dealt with threats from God.

SPEAKER_04 57:09

Martin Riggs has dealt with real threats like I don't know, like uh so what getting shot at by Nazis and the Temple of Doom guys and swords? Like snakes. Like the snakes. The Yakuza, you know, in Lethal Weapon 4. Was it the Yakuza? Yeah, so I mean they're loosely based. Alright, and then, you know, all the gangbangers and uh Russian evil people that he's met. Yeah. So actually South Africans and I think he's got a wider range of experience in killing than Indiana Jones does.

SPEAKER_02 57:38

The Nazis are the premier bad guys of all time. They are the benchmark of evil.

SPEAKER_04 57:44

Yeah, and they've spawned their next generations, which you know, inadvertently, like the Russians or whatever.

SPEAKER_02 57:49

And Martin Riggs makes the fatal mistake of calling Indiana Jones Junior.

SPEAKER_04 57:54

Junior. Just to piss him off to get into his head.

SPEAKER_02 57:58

Because he's crazy. Yeah. And then Indiana Jones goes bat nuts and beats the crap out of him. Harrison Ford's bigger. Uh uh by how much? Harris Ford, I think he's like 6'2.

SPEAKER_04 58:11

Let's see how tall Mel Gibson is. Five foot ten. Mel Gibson is? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 58:16

I looked it up for the Martin Riggs Luke ops fight.

SPEAKER_04 58:18

Alright. Well, I rest my case. Harrison Ford is six foot one. So he's what, three inches taller? Right. Alright. I rest my case.

SPEAKER_02 58:27

Leather jacket.

SPEAKER_01 58:29

I gotta go with Miguel.

SPEAKER_02 58:30

It offers protection. I gotta go with Martin Riggs. Thank you, Mitch. I tried.

SPEAKER_04 58:35

Sorry, Indiana. Thanks about the uh special forces in Vietnam, thing. Didn't know that.

SPEAKER_02 58:45

That's why I chose Martin Riggs. He was my answer to John Wick. I'm still going. All right. Uh Mitch, it's uh your turn to offer up.

SPEAKER_01 58:55

Lone Wolf McQuaid.

SPEAKER_04 58:58

Chuck Norris. Ooh.

SPEAKER_01 59:01

You already used an RPG.

SPEAKER_04 59:03

Is this Chuck Norris or Chuck Norris as lone?

SPEAKER_01 59:05

Like are they because I know we gotta go with a character, so we'll go with Lone Wolf McQuaid.

SPEAKER_04 59:09

Okay, alright. Or Booker. Just Booker. Where are they fighting?

SPEAKER_02 59:18

Sinking ship again. You know, you want to just do this. I'm tired of sinking ships. Pick one that we haven't used before. Trying to roll for it. It's not working. What's that one, right? Two, two. We do, we got two. Skyscraper roof! Alright. Totally different. Martin Riggs versus Lone Wolf McQuaid.

SPEAKER_04 59:35

Okay. Hayden. I feel like Martin Riggs has more experience in weird urban, you know, treacherous areas like a skyscraper roof than I don't know. I've never watched any crappy Chuck Norris movies.

SPEAKER_01 59:48

I have. I've been punished for this.

SPEAKER_04 59:51

So I feel like uh given the circumstances, you know, and don't forget, he's a special forces Vietnam veteran, uh a cop on the edge, nothing, no reason to live, willing to jump off that roof to take uh Chuck Norris with him.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:07

They're both dead.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:08

Yeah, but I think you really want to jump. I I think he would do it. I think he would.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:12

So now they'd land on the inflatable thing again. No, Gibson would just be laughing. Go, you want to go again?

SPEAKER_01 1:00:18

Let's do it again. Basing off of their skills that I've seen in the movies, I would say Chuck Norris just roundhouse kicks uh Martin Riggs to death without even having to throw him off.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:29

I don't know.

SPEAKER_02 1:00:31

Or does Lone Wolf McQuaid stare at him so menacingly that Martin Riggs's head explodes? Or his beard opens up and a fist comes out and punches him.

SPEAKER_04 1:00:40

I feel like Martin Riggs has experienced enough chaos and life and death situations that he could take it and find a way out.

SPEAKER_01 1:00:49

McQuaid's got the uh he's he's basically a superior Vietnam vet. And you know, he's taken out multiple armies by himself. Granted, he had guns. How many more people do you have on your list? Uh four.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:04

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:01:05

Including Chuck Norris.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:08

Alright. Uh yeah, I rest my case.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:10

And how much hand-to-hand fighting does Chuck Norris do in this film?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:14

Um, I'm very limited. Most of it's like you know, hand-to-hand with a knife. Um, but there you go. When he does, he's taken out like two or three of them at a time.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:22

I mean, you saw the Indeletal weapon, was it? Yeah, one, where he beats the crap out of uh Gary Busey. Gary Busey hand to hand, in the mud, right?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:31

Could beat up Gary Busey in the mud, hand to hand. Like any of us.

SPEAKER_02 1:01:35

Well, today. I don't know about 1986 or 1987, Gary Busey. Before his motorcycle accident. When he was fully lucid. Yeah. Or even after. How am I doing?

SPEAKER_01 1:01:46

I'm just saying it's Lone Wolf McQuaid. He's got all the martial arts skills, he's got the Vietnam. All right, I'm saying it.

SPEAKER_04 1:01:52

Chuck Norris is overhyped. All these jokes, it's just to make fun of Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris can push the earth down. It's it's all because they all know that he's just crazy and radical wears Chuck Norris' pajamas.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:04

All these jokes. Chuck Norris left the home. He told his dad you're the man of the house now.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:10

All these jokes come because the Chuck Norris is so strong.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:14

No, it's just them spoofing him because they know he's not really like that. I I'm calling it. It's the truth.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:20

He was killed by Bruce Lee. That's true.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:24

Not Lone Wolf McQueen. He wasn't.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:26

No, obviously not in Little Wolf McQuaid. Chuck Norris doesn't die in his movies. Except that one. But it wasn't his movie.

unknown 1:02:33

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:33

How many movies has Martin Riggs died in? Well, none. Exactly. So good argument.

SPEAKER_02 1:02:41

He is 4-0.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:43

How many times has Martin Riggs been saved by Murtaugh?

SPEAKER_04 1:02:46

Yeah, but you know, it's the power of friendship. Well, who Murtaugh's not there for him this time? Power of friendship, all right? Lone Wolf McQuaid has no friends.

SPEAKER_01 1:02:55

That's right, because he takes out the entire army. He doesn't need friends.

SPEAKER_04 1:02:57

Yeah, because he's a lone wolf. So what's the point of him even existing? He's got no purpose to live, no drive.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:02

Yeah, he he works for the government.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:03

Takes Martin Riggs is a broken character that needs to survive because he's learned life after his wife's wife's death. You know, that that he you know there's more purpose to living. And then he ends up marrying Renee.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:16

He might get depressed enough just to jump off the building himself. But he's learned. That's why he's so on the edge right now.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:22

You know, he does stare down a sniper who's shooting erratically at him and challenges him, and then he kills him with a pistol.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:29

Thank you, Tom. I forgot about that part.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:30

McQuay does take on the does take on the entire Viet Cong by himself and wins.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:37

But using guns.

SPEAKER_01 1:03:39

It doesn't matter. Martin Riggs takes on most of people with guns.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:43

Yeah, I mean, like, what is isn't Chuck Norris one of his movies the ones where he shoots a helicopter down with a pistol?

SPEAKER_02 1:03:50

Probably. Probably. Yeah. Then again, John McClain did the same thing.

SPEAKER_04 1:03:53

Isn't that just like ridiculous? Can't we just call these fantasy rules BS and just, you know.

SPEAKER_02 1:03:58

I think in terms of sheer hand-to-hand butt kickery. I have to say Martin Riggs. I think Are you joking?

SPEAKER_01 1:04:07

I think Martin Riggs would beat him up. I think he would. You want to take out all the special rules and then say that he would beat Chut Norris in a hand-to-hand fight.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:16

Yep. You heard it from the judge. I think Martin Riggs would beat Lone Wolf McQuaid.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:20

You gotta stop drinking.

unknown 1:04:21

I haven't!

SPEAKER_02 1:04:22

I haven't been! I'm sober! Alright, Martin Riggs, we're moving on to the next round. I think, yeah. He's got the skill set and the uh the drive and the speaking. Okay. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:35

I've got three people left. And all my weapons. Well, all but one.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:41

You've only used one so far? Yes, it'd be five. I've used two. So. Alright. Who you got, time? Who's going up against Martin Riggs?

SPEAKER_02 1:04:50

Robert McCall?

SPEAKER_04 1:04:51

I don't know who that is.

SPEAKER_02 1:04:52

That's uh the equalizer.

SPEAKER_04 1:04:55

No, he's pretty good. Hopefully it's not like an industrial complex or something like that.

SPEAKER_01 1:04:59

Roll the dice, Tom.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:00

Hopefully, we're in that dusty highway by a saloon. 11. Sinking shit.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:08

I hate sinking shit. Five. What was five? Missile silence. Darn it.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:14

What weapons do I have left?

SPEAKER_02 1:05:17

You have suppressed Glock and baseball bet. I'm not using a weapon.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:25

So Robert McCall took out a bunch of. Oh, never mind. I'm not arguing for him. Never mind.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:29

Alright. I think because it's Martin Riggs and he's crazy, life or death situation.

SPEAKER_01 1:05:34

Crazy only get you so far.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:36

He's gonna hit that go button on that missile, the launch button, while handcuffing himself.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:44

And Robert McCall is just gonna go, okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:05:46

He's just gonna stand back out of arm's reach and watch him fly away.

SPEAKER_04 1:05:51

He's gonna be like, if I'm going down, you're going down with me. They have like three minutes to figure figure it out, so to speak. So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:05:58

I've seen bits of the equal. Where he times himself.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:02

I was gonna say he just said he got three minutes. He'd be like, challenge accepted.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:06

I forgot about that part.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:07

And takes out multiple people simultaneously. Yeah. In a Home Depot. I mean, we see Martin Riggs fight pretty much one-on-one. Yeah. Whereas Robert McCall can take on multiple and beat the crap out of them while trying to set personal records for himself. I uh I think that and he does that cool slow motion projecting what he's gonna do to everybody in the room.

SPEAKER_04 1:06:30

I think that, you know, with no prep time because it is a uh life or death you know environment as a missile silo is, you know, I still give it to Martin Riggs.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:39

He's just called Martin Riggs. Robert McCall's called the equalizer. He has a cool nickname.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:43

Other than he's crazy. Do you have any other arguments? No.

SPEAKER_02 1:06:48

No. I think Robert McCall beats Riggs. We had a good run, Riggs.

SPEAKER_01 1:06:55

Yeah. That's like his main argument point. He's crazy enough to do it.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:00

I got him to like two or three. So yeah. He's crazy.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:03

Yeah, one erroneous decision. I think Chuck Norris. Whoever has somebody left the end.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:13

Alright. Alright, this is round 20. Okay. So Robert McCall's advanced, so that's sinking.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:20

That's sinking ship again. I hate sinking boat.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:24

Do one we haven't used.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:25

What's this one? Six. What's that one?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:27

We did miss Osila. Under construction

McCall Versus Bourne In The Dirt

SPEAKER_02 1:07:30

building.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:30

Alright, cool. Do that one.

SPEAKER_02 1:07:31

Alright, we're under construction building.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:33

Alright, so uh what's yours again, Tom?

SPEAKER_02 1:07:36

Robert McCall. The equalizer. Versus Jason Bourne.

SPEAKER_04 1:07:39

Oh snap. Alright. I think that's uh I'm listening. Go ahead. Mitch. Mitch.

SPEAKER_01 1:07:48

Jason Bourne takes out multiple people at a consulate by himself. I was waiting for you just to go Bourne. He's un barehanded. That just takes out multiple people with guns by himself at the consulate, so they're trained soldiers. Um he's like super good at stuff. Super good at stuff. Wait, I'm the one that's bad at modeling here.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:09

That was the greatest hype I've ever heard from anybody. He's good at stuff.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:14

I had a thought that I would probably get bombed, so I was like, I better change what I'm about to say.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:19

Alright, go ahead, Tom. Well, Robert McCall obviously has special training. Uh-huh. This equal, if not better, than Jason Bourne.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:27

You could say he would equalize.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:28

He would equalize Mr. Bourne. He Jason Bourne just runs amuck and hopes for the best, and it's not pretty how he beats most of these dudes.

SPEAKER_04 1:08:36

No.

SPEAKER_02 1:08:37

Whereas Robert McCall like telegraphs the movement in his head a split second before he while he's looking at his watch, going like a minute and a half I could do it. And then he proceeds to do exactly what he thought, like Robert Downey Jr. and Sherlock Holmes and beats the ever-loving snot out of everybody he comes across.

SPEAKER_01 1:08:54

Robert McCall takes out a bunch of like mafia and mobsters and gangsters. With Jason Borne is taking out other CIA operatives hand to hand. He beat one guy with a pencil. That is a good point. Or with a pen, he just stabbed it in his hand.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:06

That is a good point.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:08

I mean, Rob McCall was using weapons of opportunity when he beat up those mafio so type.

SPEAKER_04 1:09:13

That's a good point. Where are they fighting again?

SPEAKER_02 1:09:16

Under construction building. So you feel like multiple things that he could hit Jason Bourne with.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:22

I mean, I think Jason Bourne is just as like savvy when it comes to until Jason Bourne goes for a move.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:34

Robert McCall and then punches him in the nuts and then nail guns him to death.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:40

Robert McCall had a lot of prep time in that movie when they came to the Home Depot to get him. Like he kind of already had all that kind of prep time.

SPEAKER_02 1:09:47

But in the other ones where he just goes to beat up people, he gives himself no prep time. He just looks around the room and goes, He beat up Alright, corkscrew there, that's there, chair, clock, go.

SPEAKER_01 1:09:58

He beat up three guys that didn't really expect him to be able to do anything. Jason Bourne's gonna go in knowing that this guy he's gotta be some kind of threat. He's already gonna know he's a threat.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:07

The same goes for Robert McCall. He knows he has to kill him. He knows it's a threat.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:11

Robert McCall, he's a little older. So you know. So it's Bourne.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:14

Yeah, Bourne's got how many movies now?

SPEAKER_02 1:10:16

Four, five?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:17

He's still younger than Robert McCall. He's not gray-headed.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:20

He's dying it. He's lying to himself.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:22

Jason Bourne could put three people through walls, like kicking them through the sheet rock and all that stuff, where I think Robert McCall would be going, Oh, my hip! My hip.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:30

But does he ever complain of injury?

SPEAKER_01 1:10:32

He's getting a bow staff also. Oh, snap. The bow staff slash slash javelin.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:37

Oh, snap. Tom, how many weapons have you used? One. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:10:43

I've now used two, so I've used three.

SPEAKER_02 1:10:49

No, I haven't used any weapons. I'm sorry. I haven't used a single one yet.

SPEAKER_04 1:10:53

Alright, what are you gonna use one?

SPEAKER_02 1:10:55

You're using the javelin?

SPEAKER_04 1:10:56

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:00

No. There's enough weapons of opportunity and an under construction. There's tools lying around, two by fours. Yeah, but mine got too much. Electrical cords, poles, metal objects.

SPEAKER_04 1:11:09

Alright, I'm gonna put some more uh description into the scene here then. These two guys, they just happen upon each other, and for some reason they have to kill each other. No prep time. They just know that they're in an industrial complex, and they see each other within ten feet of each other. Javelin versus an unarmed Denzel Washington.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:32

Jason Bourne accidentally beat up two cops without realizing it. Just saying.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:38

I feel like Rob McCall has the dexterity to dodge the javelin throw. All right, going once.

SPEAKER_01 1:11:43

Macal's not gonna throw it, he's gonna use his bow staff that has a point to stab.

SPEAKER_02 1:11:48

Then he's just gonna have to pick up something as he's running at him. Because Robert McCall's gonna look at him, look at his watch, and go Robert McCall, don't run nowhere. He's gonna walk up, pick up the nail gun, start firing the nail gun at him. He's gonna make him dodge to the walk up to the end. And then as Bourne is going behind the uh sheetrock, and Robert McCall's gonna throw a metal lunchbox through it and hit him in the head.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:08

Just so you know, nail guns don't actually shoot. You have to be pressed against something. They do in movies. Not this one.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:14

Last chance, Tom. For a weapon.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:19

Oh, this is basically I have to have a good weapon now.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:22

I'm just saying.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:23

I don't want to use a weapon. I want to save it for a better round. Then don't use a weapon. No. I feel like Rob McCall has sufficient skills. Jason Bourne wins. Fine.

SPEAKER_01 1:12:32

Yes! Including Jason Bourne, I've got three people.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:38

How many are you down to, Tom? Am I in the top five yet? Top five yet.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:48

Yeah, uh, I'm I got four guys left.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:50

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:12:51

Wow. Alright. Who was born? That was me.

SPEAKER_04 1:12:58

Alright, I have against Jason Bourne. And what what setting first?

SPEAKER_02 1:13:05

Yeah, I'm just gonna put Swamp.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:08

Okay. I have Mad Max.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:11

You put Mad Max pretty high.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:13

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:14

Um Rock. As far as being hand-to-hand, Jason Bourne is a CIA operative. He's gonna like covertly sneak up and just like choke out Mad Max.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:23

Yeah, but Mad Max has survived in a post-apocalyptic world where there's no water. Imagine what he can do in a swamp. Think of how hydrated you know. He's gonna be like a superhuman.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:34

I have the power. Jason Bourne survived being shot twice and just like what do you call it? Uh sinking and or not sinking, drowning, drowning. Drowning in the ocean. He survived that. Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:46

How many times did Mad Max get shot? Mad Max. Did they have guns? Yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:52

It's been a while since I've seen a Mad Max.

SPEAKER_04 1:13:53

Mad Max has been shot, strangled, tortured, cut, you know, thrown around, thrown over, all sorts of things.

SPEAKER_01 1:13:58

I just feel like Jason Bourne's skills would outweigh Mad Max's angriness.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:04

I feel like Mad Max could take a hit.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:06

Hey, hey, hey, you're not part of this. You're just deciding who wins at the end. No, go ahead, Tom. I'll let me go with this. Jason Bourne can take hits too. He's been he's fought, like I said, multiple CIA operatives that pretty much put a beating on him until he just turned it around and improvised and killed him right there. He did some Matt Damon.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:26

Yeah, but Mad Max has like not only single-handedly killed many road warriors in the past, but he's also inspired revolutions as you know artists.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:37

What good does that do him when it's one-on-one in a fight?

SPEAKER_04 1:14:39

He just knows what he has.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:41

Animals watching. Will be inspired to crawl up Jason Bourne's pant legal.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:46

And he would do whatever it takes to survive out in the swamp. So if it meant that he had to like eat a snake with his bare hands, he would do that.

unknown 1:14:54

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:14:54

Jason Bourne would strangle him with a snake.

SPEAKER_04 1:14:57

Mad Max would strangle him with the bigger snake.

SPEAKER_02 1:14:59

I don't know. Mad Max is Australian. The snake would look at him and he'd go, Good dye, Mike. And the snake goes, I'm on it. Just go after Jason Bourne.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:09

I feel like Jason Bourne has the skills required to survive in the swamp and ambush attack.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:15

Nope. I think uh I think Mad Max will win. Mad Max has never been in the winter. Just imagine what he could do in a swamp against some nerd that worked for the government of a first world country.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:27

In a in a location he has never been in before.

SPEAKER_04 1:15:30

Well, has Jason Bourne ever been in a swamp before? He's been all over the world. He's a CIA opporte. Well, as he but he goes to cities. Has he ever been to the crappiest place in a post-apocalyptic, you know, era?

SPEAKER_02 1:15:41

They don't go go to the bayou in Louisiana and shoot Elroy. I I I rest my case.

SPEAKER_01 1:15:46

I feel like it's a little biased. I already know who Tom's gonna pick.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:50

Yeah, Bourne.

unknown 1:15:51

Oh.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:52

Come on.

SPEAKER_02 1:15:53

I was hoping you'd give me a little more.

SPEAKER_03 1:15:56

What else could I give you? He survives Australia post-apocalyptic.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:01

It doesn't get any crazier than that. I think the person who would have beat Bourne, Crocodile Dundee. No, Jason Bourne, he's a far better hand-to-hand combatant.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:13

Fine, fine. Alright, now I am the judge. I'm down to two on my list. Who do you have against Jason Bourne there?

SPEAKER_02 1:16:32

Frank Martin.

SPEAKER_04 1:16:35

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:36

Where are they fighting?

SPEAKER_04 1:16:38

That's a great question. What's uh what's this one? We've done that. So we've done them all now.

SPEAKER_02 1:16:44

Uh no, we haven't done mobile home. Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:16:48

Trailer, trailer park, trailer park fight. I think Jason Bourne just he has the skills to fight in those tight quarters. All the little like grappling and flipping and stuff. Whereas, you know, Frank Martin's more of a an acrobatic kind of kicker and fighter and stuff. But Jason Bourne, like I mean, like I said, he stabbed a guy with a pin and killed him.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:06

I feel like Frank Martin, going back to 20 years when I saw these movies, and what I remember, is Jason Statham wearing a suit. I feel like he has the hand-to-hand combat skills, because I believe he was ex-military. I don't know. Did they hint that? So he would have somewhat similar secretist training?

SPEAKER_01 1:17:29

Ex-military versus CIA, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:31

Look, he has like a chateau in South in southern France. He he he was clearly.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:35

Wouldn't you consider your training close to like ranger SEALs and stuff like that? Rangers and SEALs? I mean, we're like the baseline in infantry for but would you consider like your special forces like training?

SPEAKER_04 1:17:45

We we are the baseline. They they just are more trained than what we do.

SPEAKER_01 1:17:49

Oh, they say they're more trained. More trained than just some ex-military guy. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:17:54

I feel like Frank Martin is an equal combatant in terms of hand-to-hand combat. He takes on many, many opponents simultaneously and does his moves. I feel like inside of a mobile home, he'd be able to just run up the side of the uh pull-out bed slash refrigerator cabinet sink. Run up the side, he'd hit the head, hit his head. Well, he'd obviously plant his hand on the counter, run his feet up and whoopsh, and kick Jason Bourne in his stupid face, and his head would obviously hit something because it's such a small space. I think he would take the frying pan and go, ah, and block his punches, and the pan would just have the indent of the knuckles.

SPEAKER_01 1:18:28

And then he'd hit him in the head with it and just be Matt Damon go, uh I think Jason Bourne would, because it's such a confined space already, he would just put him into like a an arm bar or something like that, and just break it up there.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:39

Frank Martin does the same thing to people. He knows the armbars and the MMA styles.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:44

Are there weapons involved? Anybody using a weapon? Going once.

SPEAKER_02 1:18:49

Mitch, I have a cross off that you use javelin.

SPEAKER_04 1:18:52

Mitch uses javelin. Going twice. And no weapon. No weapon. Jason Bourne went. He's right. Close quarters confined space. That's like Jason Bourne's specialty. How many of you have left on your list now, Tom? Because I'm down to two. I think I've got three.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:17

I've got three, including Bourne.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:19

It's your turn. Alright, so where are we fighting? I don't think it'll matter for this one.

SPEAKER_02 1:19:27

God sinking ship is just like seven. What was seven? Mobile. How about six? What was six? Submarine. Submarine. Close quarters. Has there been one we haven't? No, we've done them all.

SPEAKER_04 1:19:40

Uh Mr. Miyagi. Mr. Miyagi is a trained fighter. Yeah, yeah. I would argue that he's a more trained fighter than the transporter or Jason Bourne, you know.

SPEAKER_01 1:19:53

How much damage can Mr. Miyagi take at this point?

SPEAKER_04 1:19:56

A lot of waxing. All right. He did beat up a lot of teenagers. That's right. So, you know, and Jason Bourne is just a you know a giant teenager. So he's just, you know, an older teenager.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:08

I'm gonna say Jason Bourne beats up and breaks his brittle old man.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:13

Look, if he can beat up the guy that was the evil cobra boss man, he can beat up the Jason Bourne.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:20

If Jason Bourne can beat Mad Max, and who was that last one? Uh Frank Martin, he can beat up Mr. Miyaki.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:25

Well, Mr. Miyaki's got that like that that mystic Yoda kind of look. Exactly. So he's just gonna be like untouchable.

SPEAKER_02 1:20:32

He just flies with chopsticks.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:34

Exactly. Every punch is just gonna be like that.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:37

That's all gonna be good when it's just hand-to-hand fighting until Jason Bourne starts picking up the frying pan or picks up Mr. Miyagi. Just tombstones into the floor.

SPEAKER_04 1:20:49

Look, I'm sticking with what I got.

SPEAKER_01 1:20:52

I'm just saying, I think Jason Bourne wins.

SPEAKER_03 1:20:57

I wanted to rip for you. You had a good run, Mr. Miyagi.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:06

If it was Danielson. You said it's 15 rounds. Here we are on round 24. Yeah, we learned a thing. Mitch now on a on a hot streak at the end. Jason Bourne. With Jason Bourne. Little does he know.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:19

I stacked my guys up for this. I have people prepared to beat up Jason Bourne. It's okay, I've got people prepared too.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:27

Jack Reacher.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:28

I think Jack Jason Bourne could take Jack Reacher. No. I mean, Jack Reacher, what, he beat up a couple of guys at a bar? I mean, we're also going Jack Reacher's based on a novel.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:40

Character.

SPEAKER_01 1:21:41

Yeah, but we're going off the movies. Action hero. Movie.

SPEAKER_04 1:21:44

How many characters do you have left, Tom? Three. And how many weapons do you have left? All of them.

SPEAKER_03 1:21:49

Why are you not using your weapons? Because I'm about to. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:21:53

Jack Reacher. MP5. Jack Reacher. Where are they fighting again? Oh yeah, we didn't choose. What was number three? Under construction building? Okay. I mean, Jack Reacher, by the novels and the Thadcastle iteration.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:13

What about the Tom Cruise one? Well, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:17

I mean, the background's the same, but the broad strokes of the character is the character's six foot six and built like a linebacker and doesn't work out, but somehow has six-pack abs.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:26

No, yeah, we're using Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise. We don't get to use Tom Cruise. Yes, we do. In the movie, it is Jack Reacher, Tom Cruise.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:35

I mean. He won Wimbledon.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:38

What? Win? What?

SPEAKER_02 1:22:40

When he was in the Army. He was a main No Wimbledon, like the army, like the shooting competition in the world.

SPEAKER_04 1:22:47

Huh. Interesting. But there's no guns in this. Well, he does. He's got a gun. Yeah, he is an Five Five.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:52

Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:22:52

So if he could do three shots at a mile and hit the and hit the bullseye.

SPEAKER_01 1:22:56

I don't think that's how Wimbledon works, but okay. In this construction site, we also have a Claymore set up somewhere that Jason Bourne set up. Alright. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:03

So his army training, he knows exactly what claymores are and probably where he would place them because he strategically out thinks his opponents. This is just he is a superior hand-to-hand combatant and takes multiple people at once.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:14

I can only reiterate what I've told said for Jason Bourne already. He's a CIA operative. He beats other CIA operatives badly. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:23:22

So Jack Reacher was sent to investigate this man, Bourne, who's run amok and killed a man. And Jack Reacher gets what Jack Reacher wants. And he has a machine gun.

SPEAKER_01 1:23:33

Jason Bourne has already set up this claymore in an undescripted place that Jock Reacher has no idea where.

SPEAKER_04 1:23:40

I I think given the environment and given the fact that survivalist instincts are what's most important here, I I would give it to Jason Bourne. Yeah. Just because he would have set up the claymore in a way that would kill Jack Reacher in an industrial complex.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:02

I feel like Jack Reacher would beat the snot out of Bourne.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:05

Oh, I'm sorry.

SPEAKER_01 1:24:06

Hand to hand, Jason Bourne will beat him every time.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:08

Really?

SPEAKER_01 1:24:09

I don't think about that. I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:11

No. No. Especially if you go by like the book version. We're not going about book version. I think you did good to use the show. Or even the show. I think you did good to use the uh big Thad Castle would beat the brakes off of him.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:23

Alright. I'm down to my guy. But we're not using that version. I'm down to my last guy. But where where are we fighting first?

John Wick Changes The Endgame

SPEAKER_02 1:24:30

This is round 25. Hang on.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:34

How many do you have left? This is your third to last?

SPEAKER_01 1:24:37

Yeah. I got three total.

SPEAKER_02 1:24:44

Here's number 10. Mechanic Shop. Okay. That's a different.

SPEAKER_04 1:24:48

I have John Wick.

SPEAKER_03 1:24:51

Well, Mitch. Save the best for last. Would you like to use a weapon?

SPEAKER_02 1:24:59

I'll tell you what you have left. You have a katana and an M60. All of which John Wick can use against you.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:06

No well, not. Jason Bourne. Jason Bourne can beat John Wick. He's almost skilled and trained.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:14

I'm not going to even say anything.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:16

And John Wick does have like the bulletproof shit.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:18

Should have quit arguing for him. We both saw the movie. That's what he's wearing. Stop arguing. It doesn't matter. It only matters what he argues about. What he can convince you of.

SPEAKER_04 1:25:29

John Wick. I guess my case.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:33

It's Jason Bourne.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:41

I don't remember villains sitting around giving exposition in fear of the who they're talking about. And he's not even there.

SPEAKER_01 1:25:48

Go ahead and give your I've like defended Jason Bourne like four times. I have nothing else to add.

SPEAKER_02 1:25:56

Yeah, John Wick. I was wondering who had.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:00

I had a crappy list, so it's good that got John Wick in the end. Thank God.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:04

Thank God for you.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:06

Alright. Who you got there, Tom? Are you down to what? Two or three left?

SPEAKER_02 1:26:11

Two. Okay. John Wick versus Rambo. Okay. What are we fighting? Jungle. No.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:23

Two. Skyscraper roof. Okay. I feel like John Wick could fall from that skyscraper.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:41

You want to go first? I'm giving Rambo the ballistic knife. Okay.

SPEAKER_04 1:26:46

So John Wick has the uh ballistic Kevlar suit.

SPEAKER_01 1:26:50

But it didn't work against blades. He's still been stabbed. Yes, he has been stabbed through it.

SPEAKER_02 1:26:54

Okay. And Rambo is a master knife-wielding man. Um he's also trained special forces, Vietnam veteran, multiple operations into Vietnam and Afghanistan in the 70s and the 80s.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:07

I mean, he did take down a helicopter with a bow and arrow.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:10

Yep. As far as knives, he easily disarmed and hidden in plain sight and took out multiple opponents simultaneously.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:18

But it's he's not fighting a helicopter. He's fighting John Wick. All right. And I think if you were to compare pitchers, focus is narrowed.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:25

We're ringing John Wick above the helicopter.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:29

Helicopter with machine guns and rockets and missiles. John Wick, well sorry, helicopter.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:34

You had a good run. If you look at the kill count between the Rambo movies and the John Wick movies, I think John Wick at least doubles the kill count.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:43

Rambo kills a lot of people.

SPEAKER_01 1:27:46

Out of what I researched he doesn't, but it's close.

SPEAKER_04 1:27:49

What close to doubling?

SPEAKER_01 1:27:51

No, it's the the the kill count is close to the same. Out of the Rambo movies, John Wick movies.

SPEAKER_02 1:27:56

Rambo has superior hand to hand fighting skills. I don't think so. He has a knife.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:01

I don't think so.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:02

That can shoot a blade into Wick's face.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:04

I think John Wick has superior hand-to-hand skills and improvised weapon skills. I think he has But he's fighting without a weapon. I think he has insane weapon uh uh uh like acknowledgement skills where he could look at the blade and know that's a ballistic knife instead of because he he he's able to fire and use any weapon that he touches. So if he saw the ballistic knife because they're all using Glocks, he would know. No, he even like when he's like using uh some weird like an axe or something like that, he knows how to swing it, nunchucks, all sorts of things. He did assemble the uh revolver, disassemble and reassemble the revolvers while fighting people, while fighting people just to be showy. That was just all funny. He took the Rambo doesn't have time to do all that, he's just killing people because he's not as efficient as John Wick is.

SPEAKER_02 1:28:50

Yeah, I mean John Wick will be walking around and Rambo will come out of nowhere and just say, like, you should have left me alone.

SPEAKER_04 1:28:56

No, no, no. John Wick would totally like either A, see him coming, or B, as soon as Rambo put his hands on him. I mean, we've seen John Wick kill people with his bare hands, dudes that were two or three times his size with guns. No. The the in John Wick chapter four, this movie that we just watched, spoiler alert, fat Scott Atkinson was a huge man. Beat him to death.

SPEAKER_02 1:29:18

He threw him over a railing so he could fall to his death.

SPEAKER_03 1:29:21

Oh, I'm sorry, where are we fighting right now?

SPEAKER_02 1:29:23

Skyscraper Roof. And you know who else could probably throw John Wick off the building? Rambo.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:31

Yeah, and but if they both went off the building, who would be the most likely to survive the fall?

SPEAKER_02 1:29:35

Rambo. No. Because he you would look over the edge and he'd have the knife in the side, and he'd go and he'd climb himself up and then boom, Rambo five.

SPEAKER_04 1:29:44

John Wick would be like him all the way down and then land on him. Why would he be beatboxing at a time like this? Doing his John Wick punches and stuff, and then land on Rambo. His organ explosion would cushion John Wick's fall, and he'd get up and walk up, go drink some milk.

SPEAKER_03 1:30:03

So I mean, Rambo also has obnoxious durability.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:07

I think John Wick has more durability. I mean, he's how many times has he been shot, exploded, you know, thrown off buildings, ran over by cars, uh attacked by dogs.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:17

Rambo was tortured by the Viet Cong.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:19

John Wick's been tortured numerous times. He's been hung, you know, hanged, uh, he's been uh cut to pieces, all sorts of stuff. So I think that if anybody brings a weapon into a fight with John Wick, that's what they're gonna die with.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:35

Even if that's that person's preferred weapon and they are an expert with knives. I'm giving Rambo a knife that also has the ability to be fired out as a projectile.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:44

And you don't think John Wick could be prepared for that?

SPEAKER_02 1:30:47

How many people do you see shoot ballistic knives at him?

SPEAKER_04 1:30:50

I don't know. How do you know? I would I would know that John Wick could identify the weapon and then find a way to get it.

SPEAKER_02 1:30:55

He would easily go bladed weapon.

SPEAKER_04 1:30:56

He would use his little Kevlar, you know, coat thing and catch the blade and then turn around and stab Rambo in the neck with it.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:04

Well, you can't, like that's it. You just I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:06

But he he's if he can kill people with pencils and books and all sorts of mundane weird objects, he could use Rambo's.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:13

Rambo is a superior fighter, would use the area well to mask himself and surprise John Wick and be able to quickly take him down.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:21

On top of a roof.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:23

Well, I mean, there's stuff up there. It was like an AC he could hide behind.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:29

Any any more?

SPEAKER_04 1:31:33

All right, John Wick has a silenced uh Glock.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:36

You can't just throw that out now. Because you you give everyone time limits.

SPEAKER_04 1:31:41

I I uh nobody gave me a time limit. So we said we could throw a weapon out whenever we needed to before the judge makes his decision.

SPEAKER_02 1:31:47

It doesn't I mean Rambo took on so many everybody in Afghanistan shooting at him at once. All right, judge.

SPEAKER_01 1:31:52

Still one will you allow it?

SPEAKER_02 1:31:55

I mean he's coming at this late in the game. That's all I'm gonna say. Objection.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:01

Objection before the verdict.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:02

Objecture.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:04

You you will will you allow it there, Judge? I will. Okay, thank you.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:07

Objection. Defense is leading the witness.

Bond Uses The M60 In A Hallway

unknown 1:32:10

All right.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:10

I gotta go with John Wick.

unknown 1:32:13

Dumb.

SPEAKER_01 1:32:13

You didn't have to give him the gun. I would have given it to John Wick.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:16

I was holding on to it too.

SPEAKER_04 1:32:17

Arn it. All right. Okay, so John Wick's still in the lead.

SPEAKER_03 1:32:28

His Irish cousin.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:32

I need guns. Lots of guns. Um, that was me, so so where are we fighting?

SPEAKER_01 1:32:39

Just go ahead and tell me.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:44

Submarine. Who am I up against?

SPEAKER_01 1:32:47

James Bond. Daniel Craig, James Bond.

SPEAKER_02 1:32:50

Okay. Alright. Who has fought on submarines? Yeah. He has experience. You go first. It's James Bond. It's true. Wick did four movies. Bond did like 30.

SPEAKER_01 1:33:07

I mean, well, James Bond, each one's different, though, right? Like they they just reuse the code name. I'm just going with the Daniel Craig versions. But uh, I mean, he's beaten people just like I mean, not as many people as John Wick because they don't just throw enormous amounts of people at him, but he's beaten the same caliber of people up and down. Same caliber of people. He's beaten other CIA or other operatives and stuff from other countries. Highly trained. Up and down. And you're stuck on there's there's no getting out of the way. You're you're it's a hallway. It's in a submarine.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:38

You don't think John Wick has fought in confined places like that?

SPEAKER_01 1:33:41

I'm just saying, James, there's nowhere for him to go. He can't disappear. He he can't use his like spinning left and right moves. It's it's a straight-on fight.

SPEAKER_04 1:33:47

I think that he makes his environment work to his advantage no matter where he's in.

SPEAKER_01 1:33:51

I think James Bond is just as savvy and durable as John Wick. I I mean, I think this is uh like a straight down the line even fight.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:01

I don't think so. I think that John Wick, when it comes to a hand-to-hand fight, would mop the floor with John James Bond any given Sunday. And that's because he obviously is able to kill anybody he puts his hands on, as opposed to James Bond, who's more reliant on gadgets and gizmos that he doesn't have as disposal. And John Wick a is able to use the corner of a railing for a stairs or a bunk, you know, metal casing or something like that. He will find a way to bash in James Bond's face.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:35

Or a submarine?

SPEAKER_02 1:34:36

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:36

So it's just like one long hallway? Pretty much.

SPEAKER_02 1:34:40

Maybe uh probably a hallway.

SPEAKER_01 1:34:42

James Bond gets an M60. So you gotta come down this hallway, everybody.

SPEAKER_04 1:34:51

All I have left is a baseball. Uh all right. I think uh what's the what's the caliber of what's what's the caliber of an M60?

SPEAKER_01 1:35:05

762?

SPEAKER_02 1:35:06

I thought it was 556.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:08

No, that'd be like uh an M240.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:10

How far away are James Bond and uh John Wick? Maybe like 30 feet.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:16

The link of the submarine?

SPEAKER_04 1:35:18

Oh that's that's quite a distance. Oh so 30 feet? Alright. How many so a Kevlar can stop three to five shots of 556? Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:35:29

He's also getting fired at with a belt-fed automatic weapon.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:33

But it is James Bond. He may be a special specialist when it comes to like weapons, but he's not in her majesty's royal. But he's uh he's not a specific specialist.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:43

You have about three feet of wiggle room to go down this hallway.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:47

I think that he could cover himself with the Kevlar, close the distance, maybe take one or two shots, and then kill James Bond.

SPEAKER_01 1:35:54

One or two shots? You're gonna get one or two shots in the first foot that you take.

SPEAKER_04 1:35:58

Alright, he gets the baseball bat, but he's chucking it. And we know how accurate it is with chucking random objects at people.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:03

Just keep your finger on the trigger, James Bond.

SPEAKER_04 1:36:06

Just keep your finger on the trigger. Right between the eyes. It's gonna go up, it's gonna breach the sub. And then before they both die, John Wick's gonna kill James Bond.

SPEAKER_02 1:36:15

He's gonna kill him with a paperclip.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:16

James Bond has an M60, and John Wick has to run down a hallway to get to him. That's all I'm saying. After he took the baseball bat and hit him in the head. That's all I'm saying.

SPEAKER_04 1:36:25

So I mean, we've seen John Wick get out of crazier situations. We know he could do it.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:30

We've seen James Bond survive a lot of stuff too.

SPEAKER_04 1:36:32

He survived in space. Let's see. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_04 1:36:36

Moonraker. Do you want to go to the body count? Who is the who has the more probably Bond. I don't think so. I think I think Wick would have for more direct, like pulling a trigger and killing a person, body count.

SPEAKER_01 1:36:49

But in James Bond movies, you don't get 30 like guys with a knife come running at you when you've got a pistol.

SPEAKER_04 1:36:54

And sometimes that happens. Sometimes they have ARs and all sorts of stuff. Sometimes they have shotguns with dragon breath.

SPEAKER_01 1:37:01

So But they don't in this instance.

SPEAKER_04 1:37:03

I think that uh I think that that that John Wick, given the baseball bat as a painful distraction, he could still defeat James Bond with an M60. 352, remember that number? That's what? The body count for James Bond? Are we gonna come down to the body count now? I'm just gonna see.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:28

114.

SPEAKER_04 1:37:30

Well, he's got 20 movies compared to John Wiggs 4. There's more movies coming out.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:37

I'm gonna give it to Bond.

SPEAKER_01 1:37:39

Come on. I knew that was the only way I could beat John Wick's.

SPEAKER_02 1:37:42

It's James Bond who has superior training as well with a fully automatic rifle. Not superior training.

SPEAKER_01 1:37:50

I just knew the only way to fully beat James Bond. I was like, it's a hallway! Give him the M60.

SPEAKER_04 1:37:55

That was my that was my golden ticket. I'm out. So now I get to judge the two of you. Bond. Is Bond your last guy?

SPEAKER_01 1:38:06

No, I've got one more after him. Jesus.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:11

We're an hour and 38 minutes into this.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:13

It's okay. We're having fun.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:14

No, we are having fun.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:16

Yeah.

Dutch Takes The Lead With Semtex

SPEAKER_02 1:38:17

Bond versus Dutch. Ooh, nice. From Predator.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:22

Where are they fighting? Wouldn't it be awesome if it was the jungle?

SPEAKER_02 1:38:27

One. Industrial complex. Okay.

SPEAKER_03 1:38:31

Stick around.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:33

Need I say more? James Bond is. Even though Dutch is strong, he's James Bond is the superior fighter in skill.

SPEAKER_04 1:38:44

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:45

And what was shown on screen, he is the superior fighter in skill.

SPEAKER_02 1:38:50

Dutch went toe to toe with a predator.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:52

Dutch got his butt kicked by the predator.

SPEAKER_02 1:38:55

Who left? Who won? Who walked away?

SPEAKER_04 1:38:57

Because the predator blew himself up.

SPEAKER_01 1:38:59

Because he was gonna kill him. Because of prep time, and he put a giant tree in the air to drop on him.

SPEAKER_02 1:39:07

I'm gonna give Dutch Semtex in an industrial complex that the whole place will blow up. Because Dutch is resourceful enough to duct tape a bunch of nails to it and yeet it at James Bond.

SPEAKER_04 1:39:19

How many people do you have left on your list, Tom?

SPEAKER_02 1:39:22

This is it. Dutch is number one. Oh wow. He's the final. Don't make that a decision. It's Arnold. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:28

Daniel Craig, James Bond.

SPEAKER_02 1:39:29

How many weapons do you have on the board? I mean, Dutch has military training, superior size and speed.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:37

Not speed. Not speed. He doesn't have speed over James Bond.

SPEAKER_02 1:39:41

He hits a predator several times. The predator let him because the predator knew it wasn't gonna hurt. He basically runs roughshrough that favela. He threw a knife so hard it went through a man and into the wall behind him so he could go stick around.

SPEAKER_01 1:39:58

I haven't seen enough James Bond movies to make a big argument. I know. It's been so long. Um I think James Bond's resourceful enough because we're not in a jungle. We're in an industrial complex where he can use the nooks and crannies of the place to ambush attack and possibly kick Arnold into the fiery lava pit thing or to you know tie, you know, wrap a chain around his neck and strangle him. I think I think he's he's quick enough and ambushy enough to do that. Yes, I said ambushy enough.

SPEAKER_02 1:40:32

Dutch is also an ambushy kind of guy. He lays a gigantic trap and he also pulls like a tree up another tree on a rope while flexing amazingly.

SPEAKER_04 1:40:43

I think given the fact that he has Semtex, we gotta give it to Dutch. So sorry, Mitch.

SPEAKER_02 1:40:50

Bond has fallen.

SPEAKER_04 1:40:51

Alright. We are down to the final two fighters, and we have a mystery uh environment to fight

Final Crane Duel For The Crown

SPEAKER_04 1:41:00

in. Okay. We are on a crane. So you can fall off on both sides now.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:07

It's like a crane platform. Yeah. I should at Arnold from True Lies.

SPEAKER_04 1:41:12

That's the environment I'm calling for this one. For your fight? It's your guys' fight. I'm dead. John Wick was my final guy. Oh, was it? Yeah. So who versus Dutch Mitch on a crane battle?

SPEAKER_01 1:41:27

Snake Pliskin with a katana.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:31

Snake Pliskan with a katana.

SPEAKER_04 1:41:36

Snake Pliskin does have an inordinate amount of luck.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:40

So does Schwarzenegger.

SPEAKER_04 1:41:42

And as Dutch, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:41:44

Okay. Then in that case, Dutch has a pump action shotgun. Alright, I will hear your arguments. I mean, A, Snake Pliskin has to close the distance to get to Arnold.

SPEAKER_04 1:42:01

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:01

Arnold can obviously probably block several swings with the shotgun.

SPEAKER_04 1:42:05

Uh-huh.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:06

Also, while firing at Snake Pliskin as he approaches, it's a crane. You're not going to find cover that easily. Right. Snake Bliskin does not wear body armor.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:14

I doubt he's He doesn't need body armor. He's Snake Pliskin.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:17

Yeah, he has an eye patch. He only has limited vision. Which seems to not affect him whatsoever. I mean, yeah, because Snake Pliskin. He's like Clint Eastwee. He looks constipated. He's barely looking. He can't see anything. I mean, Arnold obviously had fought on several different landscapes. A crane probably would not be difficult. I'm sorry, Dutch.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:38

I'm just saying that I don't think Arnold is going to be some guy that's going to be able to tiptoe on those beams. He's a big guy.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:43

I don't think he tiptoed across that giant beam when they had to get away from Predator.

SPEAKER_01 1:42:47

He struggled to get across that beam. He struggled to get across that beam.

SPEAKER_02 1:42:51

He doesn't have to. He stood on top of that little plot he made in the woods in the dark went to challenge Predator. And Predator just like over there and just like looks up and goes, uh oh, there he was. I mean, he navigates and traverses that jungle walk, and you know.

SPEAKER_04 1:43:06

Alright, so you're shooting Snake Pliskan is shooting at uh Dutch shooting at Snake Pliskin.

SPEAKER_02 1:43:13

Okay. As he approaches, and if he gets close enough, he can obviously probably take several swings at the katana with the shotgun. All right.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:20

Speak Pliskan can block. Even though it's multiple pieces, Snake Pliskan can block with that katana.

SPEAKER_02 1:43:27

But is Snake Plisken a renowned swordsman?

SPEAKER_01 1:43:30

He is today.

SPEAKER_04 1:43:32

No, he uses guns. I think he does get into a sword fight at some point in the movies. No. Doesn't he? Snake Plisken? It was in the second one.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:38

Snake Pliskin could throw his katana and use the use the time to close the distance and sweep kick Dutch off the off the crank. That's not bad.

SPEAKER_02 1:43:46

No, I think Dutch would just hop over his leg and then once they got close enough where Dutch could grab him, he's just gonna lift him off the ground, smack him into the ceiling, and then just go, I lied, and throw him off into his death.

SPEAKER_01 1:43:57

But Dutch has his his his trench coat where he can use that to like wrap around.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:01

Why would Dutch have a trench coat?

SPEAKER_01 1:44:02

I mean uh Nick Fluskin has his trench coat. He can use that to wrap around.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:05

He's gonna get caught on stuff and he's gonna hang up and fall.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:08

He's not wearing it. He takes it off, throws it around, wraps it around his foot, and yanks his foot up.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:11

While Dutch is going poof, poof, poof, shooting at him, and it's just gonna go. He doesn't have Kevlar trench coat. He's already close to distance.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:18

So, you know, he can maneuver away from the barrel of that shotgun.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:21

A special forces man is shooting at this man.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:25

What is Snake Pliskin?

SPEAKER_02 1:44:26

And he's a superior hand-to-hand combatant.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:28

Snake Pliskin.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:29

In terms of size, speed, and equal to special forces.

SPEAKER_04 1:44:33

And then John Wick came back from a dead and killed them both.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:35

He's the one operating the crane. You've got to quit pretending that Dutch has speed over people like James Bond and Snake Pliskin. He does not. You might have strength and durability, but not speed. Speed is what you need when you've got to close up.

SPEAKER_02 1:44:48

That you have to traverse across.

SPEAKER_04 1:44:50

There is one argument to be made that if you make it, I will give it to you.

SPEAKER_01 1:44:54

I've never seen the movie with Snake Pliskan in it.

SPEAKER_04 1:44:57

It doesn't matter if you've seen the movie or not, you've seen enough action hero movies to make this argument.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:01

Snake Pliskan goes to the control panel and threats and yeets Arnold offside.

SPEAKER_04 1:45:06

No. No. Are you done?

SPEAKER_01 1:45:11

I don't know.

SPEAKER_04 1:45:12

Alright. I give it to Dutch.

SPEAKER_01 1:45:14

Woo!

SPEAKER_04 1:45:15

And that's the that that was your last two, right? That was it. If you had said because these are action heroes, and the the if it's a life and death situation, the underdog is always the one that wins in an action hero situation like that.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:30

But we're not using plot holes.

SPEAKER_04 1:45:32

I would have given it to you.

SPEAKER_03 1:45:34

So the winner is Arnold. Dutch.

SPEAKER_02 1:45:38

Dutch from Predator. I guess if you could beat a predator, you win. Yeah, you could beat up a predator, you win. Oh, I get a prize?

SPEAKER_04 1:45:44

Yep. And because you uh are like it's gonna be Hayden's dry cleaning receipt.

SPEAKER_02 1:45:51

Take care of this.

SPEAKER_04 1:45:52

Because you're such a uh macho man action hero savant, you get beef jerky.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:01

Black pepper elk jerky from the house of jerky. Manly. This is a little amount. That's an expensive amount. So fair enough.

SPEAKER_04 1:46:09

Thank you. Enjoy. Oh man, that was almost a two-hour special.

Jerky Prize And Listener Challenge

SPEAKER_04 1:46:14

If you made it this far, God bless you. If you disagree, by all means, please get on our social media and entertain this podcast. Tell us what you know you totally disagree. Because like John Wick should have totally won.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:26

When it comes to these weapons, we we handpicked five weapons for our team ahead of time, so that's why we just threw them in there.

SPEAKER_04 1:46:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:32

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:33

We only had five weapons. I'm glad my strategy of not using weapons till the very end, because I still had the nightstick left.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:39

I used them when I had to.

SPEAKER_02 1:46:40

So you had to burn the M60 to kill John Wick.

SPEAKER_04 1:46:43

But that this was fun. And listeners, if you enjoyed this, if you want us to do something similar to this, maybe not to this length, but uh something similar in the future. We could do like science fiction heroes or you know, best, I don't know, comic book heroes.

SPEAKER_01 1:46:57

Yeah, whatever.

SPEAKER_04 1:46:57

And and see what we could find ways like tools and environment that kind of equalize the fights and and see what happens. But uh yeah, let us know on entertainhistpodcast.com or any of our social media uh platforms, and we would love to do this in the future. If so, you enjoyed. That's it for this special. Uh tune in for our uh Thursday special because I'm assuming this comes out after our Monday. Okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:47:23

When whenever Mitch releases it.

SPEAKER_04 1:47:25

Right. And uh, but we're we're here every Mondays and Thursdays, and whenever specials like this come out. So goodbye from Mitch. Bye, goodbye from Tom. Goodbye from me and goodbye.

SPEAKER_01 1:47:40

That was a long one.